Nomsa Buthelezi and her partner are in a very good space.Since publicly posting her partner on social media in August, she has been very open about their relationship.
“She is very supportive of me, and loves me just as I am. It is very liberating to be with someone who is comfortable in their sexuality and does not need to hide. We have both had our fair share of relationships with people in the closet, who would have a lot of restrictions about what we could and could not do in public.
“In this relationship, we can be ourselves and show love to each other however we want. We hold hands in public, we kiss and we don’t have to be apologetic about it,” Nomsa said.
She counts herself lucky to have a partner who embraces all her curves.
“In our community there is this sinister mentality that being a certain size makes you unattractive. But I am lucky to have a partner who does not want me to lose an inch.
“I was recently talking to her about getting a summer body and she was adamant that she does not want to lose her meat. She says I can do whatever I want but that she loves me with some meat on my bones, and that I should stay as I am.”
She has not been alone in her journey as she has also received immense support from her parents.
“Over the years they would give me hints that insinuated that they knew about my sexuality, like constantly encouraging me to be myself and reassuring me that they love me regardless. So I think they knew that I was not straight.
“They are very supportive of my relationship. They have met my partner and they love her. My mother is such a character and would ask me questions like ‘how do you guys get intimate’, and I always tell her that she has ushukela [diabetes] and that she will faint if I told her, which always puts her in her place.
“My [two] kids also love and embrace me as their mom, and although they experienced bullying and teasing in school about their mom being lesbian, it has not shaken them.”