7 Types Of Men Found In Kenya’s Entertainment Industry! Which Are You?
Okay, so Nali did a piece about the types of groupies there are in the Kenyan entertainment scene aye? I’m not on her tip. I would rather talk about the types of men found in the Kenyan entertainment industry. From the sleaziest to the most noble if any such man does exist.
And the list of men to be found in the Kenyan entertainment industry are:
#1. The S3xual Predator
This is the guy who uses his position of “power” and “influence” over a girl or boy (really depends on his fancy) to demand sexual favours in return for whatever it is they are offering. And from what I have personally witnessed, this crop of men are rampant in the music production and modelling worlds.
These are the guys who tell a lass that they will produce their music in exchange for some head or that they are in a position to give them modelling gigs in exchange of sex. Steer clear away from this sexual parasite! If you encounter them, run because coercion is a form of rape!
#2. Mr. Clean
To the unsuspecting public he is the epitome of what a clean image is. He is always shown to be a family friendly brand and he always makes his public outing complete with his wife/longterm girlfriend in tow to complete the family friendly look. But what you don’t know is that this type of lad has a bagful of scandals and drama that I don’t even know how he keeps his head above water! This is the guy with paternity cases filled against him in the family courts but he has somehow managed to keep them from getting to the limelight!
#3. Mr. Bible Thumper
There are two kinds of gospel artists, those in it to minister the good word (and these are as rare as unicorn piss) and those who view gospel as a hustle. The latter are who I am speaking of today. They are the type to get caught in a “Holy Ghost whirlwind” and take every lass they can lay their hands on to bed! These are the lads who deny drinking then run away when I meet them at Changes Pub, Westlands. These guys are who I consider to be truly nocturnal because they only get the courage to live when darkness sets in!
#4. Mr. Ghetto Fab
These are the guys who have the talent and drive to make it but they cannot seem to cut ties with the lads they grew up with. Have you ever wondered why Gwiji says that “U-ghetto mingi ndio ili-cost hip hop huku Kenya”? Ask yourself what happened to the hip hop pioneers K-Shaka and Ukoo Flani Mau Mau. Never be ashamed of where you’re from but never be afraid to leave the negatives of the slums and ghetto behind. Ask Juliani and Ekko-Dydda why they shine!
#5. Bad Boys
These are the guys who genuinely couldn’t give a… Yeah! These are the lads who go about making their money and the only time you ever get noticed is when you can elevate their status, scratch their sexual itch or mess with their money. No quarters drawn, no quarters given! These are the guys who seem to be unscathed from all the controversial circumstances they always seem to land themselves into.
#6. The White Knight
Sir Lancelot for all you who do not know him is that guy that takles a bullet for his mistresses while leaving his actual family to starve. This is the guy that is always in the club popping bottles at the only club celebrities hit up: Changes Pub, Westlands yet we all know he has a child stashed in some hidden dark and dank crevice. he is the guy that gets into fights “defending a lady’s honour” yet his own baby mama is chilling in the crib crying her eyes out because she doesn’t know how she is going to pay the rent.
#7. The Genuine Guy
Usually a simple soft spoken lad who entertains us simple for the love of it. This guy doesn’t care for the hullabaloo surrounding their superstar status, all they want to do is continue pursuing what they love: music.
And I’m sure all you industry bigwigs and celebrities are reading this and thinking to yourselves, “Damn! How does this kid know all this?”
