Month: September 2014

Jacqueline Matubia  burst into our screens as the snobby, haughty and manipulative student ‘Jolene’ in Tahidi high.

A role that she has played so flawlessly that she is considered one of the best actresses around.Her hard work has finally paid off and she is set to host a show on Ebru TV.

Jackie shared the photo below captioned:
My co~host and I doing our thing #workflow #lovingwhatidobest #thankyouGod #Yconnect #ebruafrica #backtowork

Wily Paul found himself in an awkward position after trying to use Vera’s botched bleach job as a ‘teachable moment’.

In a post on Instagram Willy Paul said” I hope our girls have seen this, bleaching is not the key to eveything.. I was so sad to see our girls following the roots of vera sidika, we all know she bleached every part of her body which is not Godly, Gods work has no mistake. Anyway, asiye skia la mkuu uvunjika guu.. look at what bleaching has done to our sister vera, she cnt even walk in the sun coz her skin can easily fall off… her face is even changing colors… what is happening to our KENYA.. well I was so sad when veras case first came across, the media made it look like a good thing and our girls followed that.. Lord have mercy. ”

He might have had  appoint but Kenyans would none of it since Willy Paul has been embroiled in countless controversies since his debut into the music industry.Clearly unimpressed by his holier than though stance some fans had this to say:

sheewambu: Willy Paul stick to gospel and mind your own business

miss__billie: ‘our girls?’ ok grandpa!!

Jackiemunnesh: Stop insulting beta mind your business else where

cliffordloadapp I gss u nid to back to school young boy singer r u learned or #mind ur own biashara
cker254 Don hate on a bitch..its her life..we all got ours..

prittysonia Who are u to judge her???…..i have never seen her bother about u….n its nt like your perfect…so i would advice u to mind ur own business…#justsayingthough….#facts…. 

254jeremy- Wee kijana utaacha umbea, first thing.. You are too controversial so i don’t see the point why you be judging her @willypaulmsafi stick to your shallow music and let her stick to her renovated ‘office’

ann_petrovaah -Mind your own business Willy n Vera is not a kid like u can u show some respect.

melorisphilter- Why are hating when people were cyber bullying you did @queenveebossette say anything abt you so please stay on your lane @willypaulmsafi

 hesbonjucicx-That ain’t your life buddy. Stop all the yap yap

Others however did not think he was out of line and rallied in support:

mijaydelaqut2 Yeaa true dat willy…think kenyan gals shud learn smethn

hellenelijah umesema ukweli….

pinnkie16 true that @willypaulmsafi

What do you guys think, given his history should Willy Paul critique or he has sagely wisdom despite his behaviour in the past?

Just from the way she was continuously passing the heavy chocking smoke through her nostrils; one can clearly note that the flamboyant Huddah is a chain smoker or something of that sort.

Was she doing it for sheer fan of it or just to show off? Whatever the answer is; Huddah was caught on camera smoking shisha. Just to make sure we are on the same page; shisha is an oriental tobacco pipe with a long flexible tube connected to a container where the smoke is cooled by passing through water and then the smoke inhaled through a hose.

 

Now that we now have an idea of what shisha is, let us go back to our girl Huddah; she was exhaling some really heavy smoke through her nasal cavity. One could easily mistake huddah’s nostrils to one of those chimneys in industrial area which continuously pass a big chuck of thick smoke every time. Here is the video of Huddah doing her stuff; watch it out:

 

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It may be new to the Kenyan media game but Ebru TV is coming for the top spot, the numero uno, they want to be the lion that roars and other media corporations tremble.

And they have a grand plan that will enable them to conquer the industry; they aim to deliver a ‘complete television experience that is both wholesome and exhilarating for family viewers of all ages.’

The media house which is subsidiary of Samanyolu Broadcasting Company (SBC) has employed the very best to ensure that their dream is realised among them Kamene Goro and Michelle Morgan.

But behind every magnificent team is a great studio with state-of the- art equipment. Take a peek at the grandiose Ebru Africa Studios

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WE MET ON FACEBOOK. AND FELL IN LOVE. AND GOT MARRIED!

My name is Washington Mwangi Kinyanjui. I am 31 Years old. I am a married Man. To one VERY BEAUTIFUL Angel,Christine Muna Mwangi.

One day,I logged onto popular social networking site, FACEBOOK, looking for a long lost friend, but I got so much more.

I typed in ‘Grace Njeri’ and got numerous results. I sent a ‘friend’ request to the one most likely to be the lady I was looking for. It turned out I had sent a request to the wrong Grace Njeri, but through that mix-up met the love of My Life

After browsing through Grace’s list of friends,I found Christine Muna Mwangi, 26, now MY wife of four months.

Christine is the sister of the ‘wrong’ Grace Njeri.

Christine and I are both consultants specializing in IT and communications respectively.

We began chatting with each other on FACEBOOK and became friends. We did not meet face-to-face until five months later. When Christine and I started chatting,SHE was on the rebound from a previous relationship.

She was also weary of ‘church’ guys, because HER experience with the few that SHE had dated had not been pleasant.

However,MY constant FACEBOOK updates with quotes by renowned Pastor T.D Jakes became one of the reasons for US to finally meet up.

Christine began teasing Me about My updates, telling Me that we should meet sometime and I could preach to Her.

We had Our FIRST meeting in February 2009. After nurturing Our friendship further, We began dating the following month.

We decided right from the beginning that we would not entertain mind games in our relationship. This was a great decision because it made us very open with each other.

It is this same openness that has helped US deal with each other’s past and accept the other person as they are.

They can talk about anything freely. Infact,Christine and I are so comfortable with each other that the marriage proposal came without a lot of fanfare.

In August 2009, Christine and I were visiting my parents in Eldoret and after coming back to Nairobi I sent her a text message asking her to marry me.

Yes,JUST LIKE THAT!

And she said ”YES”!!!

Christine described Washington as someone with a gentle and loving nature.

“He is so different from anyone I ever dated and he treats me so well. We text each other constantly – it’s our thing – which is why the way he proposed was so special,” she says.

It took the us 14 months to plan and save for the wedding, which took place on October 23, 2010.

 

We exchanged vows at St. Francis ACK Church grounds in Karen and a reception followed at the same venue. The décor was a beautiful mix of gold and maroon.

So bright was the day that it was hard to believe it had rained heavily the night before. I was quite worried when it started raining, considering that we were having a garden wedding.

I thank God that the sun came out and everything went smoothly. The wedding could not have been more perfect for the Us.

There was a lot of dancing,laughing,fun,music and merry-making.

However, there was a damper a week before the wedding when Christine was involved in a car accident. Although she was not seriously injured, she suffered some bumps and bruises, which, thankfully, cleared up before OUR big day.

 

She wanted a SPECIAL Day…AND I gave Her EXACTLY that!

OUR hope is that OUR marriage will grow deeper in love and friendship, as well as in faith.

And we hope that God grants Us awesome children who fear Him,Honor Him and Honor Us as their Parents too.

LOVE can Be found ANYWHERE. EVERYWHERE.

I found My Wife on FACEBOOK.

Anything is Possible.

Keep searching….

 

 

 

 

Two gentlemen and a lady are the three representatives who are joining their colleagues at Big Bother Africa Hotshots down in South Africa.

Here is more information from the BBA representatives revealed today:

 

 

Malawian Hairdresser Sipe is 24 years old and her favourite TV shows include Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Say Yes To The Dress, How Do I Look?, Jerseylicious and Idols. Her favourite musicians are Beyonce, Brandy, Sam Smith and Zahara and her favourite actors are Idris Elba and Angelina Jolie. She lists Beyonce as her role model because ‘she’s hardworking and she makes it look so easy. I’d love to be like her’. Sipe’s Mom played a huge role in her life too. ‘She raised three children on her own and it hasn’t been easy for her, but she managed to see us through school. She’s a very strong woman,’ she says.

Hip hop singer Trezagah is from Mozambique and he is 31 years old; he studied Civil Engineering. He doesn’t have a favourite food because he says he loves eating. Trezagah was inspired to enter Big Brother Hotshots by watching previous seasons. He is both happy and nervous at the thought of having the continent’s eyes on him. He says the best thing about Africa is ‘the culture each country preserves’ and says his favourite place in Mozambique is Yofo Beach. He likes the Caribbean Islands because he’s a great fan of nature. His role model is Jay-Z, ‘because he knows how to dress, how to be on stage, how to behave and has good business control’. His parents have played an incredibly influential role in his life because they always showed him what was right and what was wrong.

A 1.93m-tall model with a Higher National Diploma in Maritime Studies, Tayo, from Nigeria, certainly stands out in a crowd. He is 28 years old and he lists his favourite foods as Eba an Okra Soup mixed with fish stew, his favourite musicians as 2Face Idibia, Beautiful Nubia and D’Banj. He entered Big Brother Hotshots because he believed in himself, and was also encouraged to enter by others. ‘I like to be seen and to be heard,’ he says. Tayo says he’s not willing to change who he is or disgrace his family and friends to impress viewers or his fellow Housemates. If Tayo wins the grand prize, he says he will set up his life and give himself a life of luxury.

More information on Maisha Magic

 

According to the grapevine, Wangechi the petite rapper is out of hospital. This is a rumor that has been peddled zealously  by a popular Friday pull-out faster than sticks of weed at  Juja Boys.

It is great news and probably the writer wanted to restore hope to Wangechi’s fans but sadly it is a lie, a white lie.
A fabrication that has been rubbished by Wangechi’s manager Kevin Provoke  on social media:

 

So am just from hospital to see Wangechi and she specifically said that the since she is getting ready to get out of hospital she want me to put out one of her songs that she did with Karun as a thank you gift for everyone’s prayers…..‪#‎mindyourownbusiness‬ ‪#‎superhumans‬

She has been on the cover of every high-end Fashion magazine that you can name, she has been on the lips of every Haute couture connoisseur that you can conceive. But who are some of the people that Lupita has met?We all concur that the list extends to infinity, but this piece will capture the momentous ones- 

1. She met the Obamas over dinner some times back. -If The Obama’s call you over for tea or a snack, you have every reason to feel sweet. 

2.Lupita with Aaron Paul of Breaking Bad  attending the 7th attend the 7th annual Veuve Clicquot Polo Classic

 

3.Lupita with Non-Stop co-star Julianne Moore and actress Olivia Munn at the Veuve Clicquot Polo Classic, May 31st 2014

 

4.Lupita poses with Womenswear designer of the year award recipient Joseph Altuzarra at the winners walk during the 2014 Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA) fashion awards

 

5.Lupita  with John Legend 

6.Lupita and designer Francisco Costa attend the Calvin Klein Collection party during the 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival

 

And the award for the most awesome, loyal, fantastic radio audience goes to….*drum rolls please* Kameme listeners!

When I saw this story courtesy of Njogu Njoroge, I was stunned,incredibly impressed and my faith in humanity was restored.

Shiru wa G.P got a major reprieve when Kameme Listeners came out in drones to her rescue after the misfortunes that have befallen her family.Shiru recently lost her son and her and her and her remaining child were admitted to hospital after the burial of her newborn, mind you,this all happened  in a span of 2weeks! So you can imagine the crazy financial and emotional crisis that resulted from all this.

Her cloud however got  a silver lining when her fans on Kameme F.M came through to support her and contributed over 3.2 Million shillings to help her with the hospital bill.

This is according to Kameme F.M presenter Njogu Njoroge who shared this:

This morning i hosted Ciru wa GP.She has been going through a lot plus huge hospital bills. Kameme Fm listeners generously contributed over 3.2 million Kenya shillings in a record 2hrs.God bless you so much my brothers and sisters

 

 

Twitter users in the country have mentioned yet another hilarious tag a couple of times to make it be among the trending items on twitter.

The event that transpired in Kwale County where CORD leader Raila Odinga and Kwale governor Salim Mvuyra were attacked by a man has saw Kenyans on Twitter start a tag that has now gained traction to be among twitter’s trending items. This marks another peculiar habit of Kenyans to turn around any event and make a joke out of it.

The posts are extremely funny; check out the posts here:

 

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane The owner of this ‘feeling’ station.

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane musicians who sing “”Mateke Mateke”” yet they shld be peacemakers

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Other Men responsible for the highest incidence of school dropouts and early marringes in the Republic

Parody Man Loses His Mind and Makes No Effort to Find It. #thingskwalemenshouldcane

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane People who stop you in the streets, well dressed…to ask you for loose change right after quoting a bible verse.

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane the guy in orange

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane the people who erect stupid bumps,and then remove after complains by #KOT – sample Mbagathi Way!

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane anyone who sends you please call me then you call and they’re like, I only wanted to say hi! NKT!

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane mtoto wa class one anarepeat tena apate laptop next yr tena

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane People who still use x in there texts

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Chics who think ukimgottea unataka kumvybe!

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane those ladies who sleep na tisho za campaigns

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane people drinking liquor n shouting about like they thought others a broke

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Kenyan’s who like free beer

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane girls who have stopped wearing clothes nowadays and just wear tights!!”

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane ladies who cook potatoes in everything including potatoes

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Pastors who sleep with people’s wives.”

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane People who fear thieves,robbers & Alshabab more than God.

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Lenku’s speeches

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Guys who are scared of getting married but love to have sex

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane All those who are not participating in this TT

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Vera Sidika back to dark skin

#ThingsKwaleMenshouldCane all politicians who dance with their wives

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Khalwale’s pronunciation of the word GOVERNER.

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane watu wenye hucatch feelings kwa twitter

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane Ladies who fear Pregnancy more than HIV.

Hutu tusichana huvaa sketi fupi alafu wanashinda wakizivutavuta chini kila time #ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane

#ThingsKwaleMenShouldCane People who call you at night and ask “Boss, Umelala?”
   
 
 

 

 

“For many say that they have seen angels, but i have seen thee, and thou art enough…”

 

 

Her Name is Najma Purple HipHop Icon and she was created on a Friday evening, when the moods were between awesome and somber. That’s why she is the sexiest Somali woman in Kenya. No questions about that.

 

 

 

 

 

What do you think folks, is she a dazzle? or is my sense of beauty still stuck at the sewer?

She came, she bleached, it backfired.That is the sad story of Vera Sidika.

Maybe we are deriving pleasure from her bad luck as Kenyans do not seem too upset about her eerie new look.Or maybe we subscribe to the Swahili adage  ‘Mwiba wa kujidunga haumbiwi pole’.

Whatever it is,KOT have really gone HAM on her latest misfortune…

 

 

Vera Sidika has been trending on social media…but for all the wrong reasons.As it turns out her 50 Million skin lightening procedure has had dire effects on her skin.She looks super pale and is a far cry from the chocolate beauty we fell in love with in ‘You Guy’.

It seems that her pursue for ‘better looks’ has super-backfired.And i think it is sad,because beautiful chocolate colored women are pursuing a lighter skin and it is scary just how many women are willing to trade in their melanin for a ‘mkorogo’ at River Road.Who says being light-skinned automatically translates to being prettier?

Internationally,we have some dark skinned sisters such as Tika Sumpter,Gabrielle Union anld kelly Rowland who look so damn hot.Back at home girls like Joyce Omondi,Esther Arunga and This Is Ess floor us with their undeniable beauty.

 

Ladies appreciate the skin you are in,the body you are in because you look perfect just the way you are since God makes no mistakes.You look the way you look for  a reason,just ask Lupita Nyong’o,the world’s MOST BEAUTIFUL woman.

 

Tahidi High Actors Caught on Camera Getting all cosy!!

When you have dudes and dudettes in the same enclosure, there is bound to be some chemistry brewing, cupid struck Tahidi high’s Beauty Lisa and Kelvy. The two have apparently been on that vibe that is making Romeo and Juliet look like child-play.

Here is the Exclusive:
Last week the actors were attending a production meeting, Beauty Lisa and Kelvy seemed to be really cosy around each other, the photos that i will post below were posted by Lisa on their whatsapp Tahidi production group later that day, a move that sparked speculations that the two were more than “just classmates”

Why does it look like Lisa is more in love than Kelvey is?

The two love-birds in the making have been spending more time together than is neccesary for a “formal work relationship” they spent an evening during the weekend watching plays at the theater,like a perfect couple, workmates do that all the time right? But see, they also attended Sunday service together! Okay, This is not klingon, any two-year old can tell what is brewing here! They have fallen/slid/jumped into love!! The two, as i gathered have been spotted making out in the public too, Yes PDA!

 

 

for every photo taken, a peck was present, in like how many photos? A million?

 

 

These, Ladies and gentlemen are our next celebrity couple,i shall keep you posted on the same, like, keeping up with the Kelvies!

 

If you’re presently having breakfast or public displays of affection get you nauseous, we apologize in advance for what you are about to see.

We present to you these outrageously steamy photos of Risper Faith locking lips and tongue wrestling with an unidentified man at Skyluxx. The boootylicious babe gave this man, what I imagine was the kiss of a lifetime on a night out.

 

 

Oh yes..that’s the spot….

 

Praise Jesus…hallelujah!

 

Time to cop a feel…

 

Damn!Paparazzi!!!

 

 

Tony Mochama’s wife alleges that the said Victim Shailja has been ‘witch-hunting’ her husband for a while and that the sex molestation claims are just but a way for Shailja to hit back at Tony for their prolonged beef.

In an interview with MondayBlues; Sharon the wife to Tony Mochama revealed that the assault allegations that were levied against her husband were mare malevolence deemed to settle old score that Shailja had with Smitta. Sharon reveals that Smitta had met Shailja down in Lamu in 2006 and Shailja declared that Smitta would not make it as a writer; from then onwards Shailja has always been ‘hostile’ towards Smitta as whenever they met, Shailja would always give Smitta a cold shoulder.

Here is what Sharon had to say to the MondayBlues:

“I want this to go on record. My husband met Shailja in Lamu in 2006 and it was then when she said he would not make it as a writer. In 2007, she openly snubbed Tony at a Go Down function, while in 2008, after he had given a brilliant reading at the Sunday Salon session in Kengele’s Lavington, Shailja complained Kwani we had a ‘drunk’ artiste. “Finally, on the Friday of July 17, 2009, Smitta in his Scene@ column (Pulse Magazine) had a humorous crack at her about their beef and her stiff approach to life and poetry. I believe it is this malice that has led her to tell bitter lies everywhere against Smitta,” Sharon claimed. “My hubby has never and has no need to sexually assault anybody in his life and we as a family stand by him in this time of a bitter witch-hunt by some ill-meaning individuals,”.

 

 

The ambiance was great, the music was rich and everyone was pretty excited that ‘baba’ was there. They were getting down to the beautiful coastal music when out of the blues a clearly irate man came and caned Raila…hard.

Before he could do additional damage, Raila aides came to his help but the furious man tried to thrash Raila again. Needless to say, the party had to stop on a low note and not even Camp Mulla could revive it.The heckler was wrestled to the ground before being escorted to what looks like a police vehicle.

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As expected, this video has spread faster than bushfire as this incidence comes swiftly after Uhuru Kenyatta was heckled in Migori. It’s like our leaders can no longer talk or dance in peace without anyone assaulting or heckling them.
Speculations as to why this man whooped Raila have risen; some people are like ‘Raila was dancing suggestively with the man’s wife’ while others assume that the man is mad, bonkers just like KTN allegedly did.

This could not go unnoticed by the resident provocateur Robert Alai who had this to say

 

KTN diagnosed the man who canes Raila and reached conclusion that he is mentally unstable. Very fast doctors.

 

It is the very last day of the Month of September and how well can work-going bees celebrate this day other than banking that much awaited pay cheque?. There are so much to look up to this Tuesday morning; let me add joy to your day by hooking you up with the hottest stories that were trending over the past day:

 

#1Steel Wool Would Have Worked Better on Vera Sidika, the 50 Million Bleach Job Was Just a Big Mess

#2Did Huddah Just Refer To Vera as A Dead Body after Seeing Her Horrific New Look?

#3CABU GAH DIARIES: These are The Kings and Queens of Kenya’s Entertainment Industry. You better Bow Down!

#4This is Why Eastland’s “Umoinner” Buses Are Trending on Twitter

#5The Star Journalist that Uhuru Kenyatta Spotted From a Crowd at State House Pays Dowry (Photos)

#6Chris Kirubi Publicly Blasts His Employee, Amina Of Capital FM

#7KTN News Anchor Mwashirima Kapombe Flaunts Her Baby Bump (Photos)

#8Funniest Images from Chris Kirubi Blasting Capital F.M’s Amina Abdi

#9Damage Control: Chris Kirubi Reconciles With Capital FM’s Amina After Public Blast

#10Indian Girl Of ‘My Bukusu Darling’ Fame Gets a Rude Shock When She Meets Her Co-Wife

No time for stories. You gotta watch this first. Tuongee baadaye.

Some crazy nutcase CANES Raila Odinga kama mtoto wa nursery school at a public rally in Kwale. Na hii ndio video. Its short. But weird. very weird.

Luckily,he’s knocked down to the ground. And I believe alipewa kichapo cha mbwa.  Mbwa za Juja.

 

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The noisy and entertaining Neomi Ng’ang’a will not be making the noise alone again in One FM’s 1Drive Madness show.

Neomi Ng’ang’a

She has a co-host; MUNG’ALA MBUVI.

Mbuvi in his twitter account describes himself as a father,comedian, singer, composer, actor, TV host and radio presenter.

Mung’ala Mbuvi

But Mbuvi is well known for his role in the famous XYZ show as a voice artist who ensured the voices sounded like those the images represented.

Announcing the news on her twitter account, Neomi told her fans that she will be introducing Mbuvi today in her evening show.

This is what she said:

 

 

It’s that time again; we are stuck up with thoughts of the weekend, and wishing the higher deity was more merciful to have balanced the working days to the ‘resting’ days. *sigh*

So while watching the weekend rolling itself ever so quickly, I decided to spend my Sunday watching movies. Now you might be thinking ‘so what?’ wait I finish you’ll know why. I unveiled a secret to watching HD videos at 10 bob! Not the illegal copyright DVD’s we are used to buy, nah..this is legit! Startimes and Rapid Communications are the ones behind this amazing technology, so it’s legit, trust me. Long story short, I spent my whole Sunday watching movies, on my phone. Less ‘fighting’ between my brother and I on which channel we are to watch, and HD video streaming for me, everyone stays sane at the end of the day. *Happy dance*

As I’ve been taught…it’s a blessing to share.

So here’s how to get this technology working for you;

• You need a phone; Smartphone.

• Go to www.vookaonline.com

• To access the StarTimes channels – Send an SMS to 22832 with the word ‘StarTimes’

• Select a StarTimes channel of your choice

• Start streaming.

And you don’t need to be fixed at one point for it to download & you do not need a decoder. All this for 5 bob for one channel and 10 bob for all channels

 

 

An honorific title is a word or expression with connotations conveying esteem or respect when used in addressing or referring to a person. And these titles can also be found in Pop music World over. Honorific nicknames in popular music are often religious, familial,or (most frequently) royal and aristocratic in nature and are used as a form of expression in the media, or to identify the significance of an artist by fans.

Honorific titles are applied to a performer or Celebrity either by : the Media, Fellow Celebrities, Fans, Critics or By themselves. The titles include “Father” “King” “Queen” “Godfather” ‘Mother” “Prince” “Princess” ‘First Lady” “God” or ‘Goddess”.

For instance Michael Jackson is the KING OF Pop. Gloria Gaynor is the QUEEN Of Disco. Britney Spears is the PRINCESS Of Pop. Madonna is the QUEEN Of Pop. Mahalia Jackson is the QUEEN Of Gospel. Aretha Franklin is the QUEEN Of Soul. James Brown is the GODFATHER Of Soul. Elvis Presley is the KING Of Rock. And so on and so forth.

One title can be shared by more than one performer…For instance,Beyonce,Lady Gaga,Madonna,Christina Aguilera and Rihanna have all been referred to as QUEEN OF POP by various critics,media outlets and showbiz stakeholders.

So,WHO ARE the Kings,Queens,Princes,Princesses,Gods and Godfathers of Kenya’s Entertainment Industry?? To compile them,I have looked at their Experience in the Industry, Their star power, their entertainment stats, their originality, their expertise at a particular field and their mastery and adeptness in that particular field.

This list is PURELY MY LIST. Cabu Gah’s List. I may not be 100% correct. But I have tried to remain as neutral, as factual and as reliable as possible in the compilation.

Good…Now FOLLOW ME to the KINGDOM OF the GREATS!

And DON’T FORGET to remove Your shoes….The People You are about to meet are GREAT. TOO GREAT.

 

KINGDOM: RADIO.

QUEEN-Caroline Mutoko. Everyone knows who the Queen of Radio is. EVERYONE. Including the rats in Your grandmother’s granary. She copped that title 10 Years ago. And will never let it go. NEVER!

KING– MZAZI WILLY M TUVA. Half of Kenya listens to his critically-acclaimed Afternoon show on Citizen Radio,Mseto East Africa. Rumor has it that his salary is higher than Homa Bay’s annual County Budget. Go to any Kenyan village today,ask them who they listen to,and “Mzazi” is all You will hear. Plus half of East Africa’s Musicians owe their career to him. Bow Down to the King. Bow Down!

PRINCESS: Mwalimu Rachael…Homeboyz Radio’s Freshest,swankiest,sweetest and bubbliest Voice….She commands a huge audience for her Homeboyz show Class 1-4. And commands a super loyal fanbase.

PRINCE: Shaffie Weru. No argument about that. I repeat,No argument about that!

 

KINGDOM: TELEVISION.

QUEEN: Julie Gichuru. Classy,elegant,witty,influential and graceful. Some of the many adjectives that can be used to describe Julie. A woman severally named as one of Africa’s Most Powerful Women. Go,Julie,Go.

KING: Jeff Koinange….He has been smoooooooooooooooooooking HOT! Since 2007,when he joined Mediamax-owned TV station,K24. His style,presence,accent,command and maverick skills are wayy tooo hot. Wayyy tooo HOT! Someone pass Me the Extinguisher! Quick!

PRINCESS: Lilian Muli. Ok…Ok…What do I say here??? And why didn’t I put up my crush Sophie Wanuna here?? Because I am a professional. That’s why.

PRINCE: Larry Madowo. I don’t even know why Larry is NOT the King…But its only a matter of time. This kid is HOT. Like seriously hot! I mean,No other Kenyan show has the kind of audience that #theTrend commands. Plus his TV hosting skills? Unparalleled.

 

KINGDOM: GENGE…

KING: Jua Caaaaaaaaaaali! He created Genge! Yes,He and Him alone. And he is the reason why Mejja even has a career. It stared with a lazy song “Ruka” and to this day,He is one of the MOST sought after performers Nationally. His relevance has never faded. Never! Long Live the King!

GODFATHER: Nonini. Also a Genge Pioneer,Nonini actually baptized himself the Godfather. And,truly, He is. No one disputed. He is Tha Godfather. And forever will be. Amen and Amen.

PRINCE: Mejja. Jimwat could have easily claimed the title Prince. But,No, He stopped being relevant before Ghafla was born. So,Kudos Mejja. You’re still holding it down. Although 80% of the music You’ve been putting out of late is, to me,absolutely unbearable.

 

KINGDOM: HIPHOP.

KING: Abass Kubaff. Or Jerry Doobiez. No arguments about this! DONT EVEN START! Abass has been doing this for the last 20 Years! Before Willy Paul was born. Or Bahati. His rhymes are sicker than a whole Ebola concentration camp. Best Hiphop lyricist. Best Rapper. Best MC in the Game. And he is still relevant. 20 Years down the line! He is Kenya’s Nas. LONG LIVE,King Abass! Thou art Great!

QUEEN: Nazizi. She claimed this title 10 Years ago. And,No,she will NEVER give it up! NEVER! Queen Forever! And ever!

PRINCESS: The One and Only Wangechi. Beautiful,smooth,smart,gifted,slick,witty,bold and fresh. Nazizi,Watch Out! This Girl is coming For Your Crown. And Everyone Else’s Crown. Bow Down,Bitches!

 

KINGDOM: DISS TRACKS. BEEF HIPHOP.

KING: Chiwawa. You DO NOT want to mess with Chiwawa. I repeat,You DO NOT want to mess with Chiwawa. This Nigga can diss You so bad Your Mother will disown You. And make Your Girlfriend question why she ever loved You. Go slow on this Ninja. Please do. You’re warned!

 

KINGDOM: SOCIALITES.

Queen: Vera Sidika. Or Vee S Beiby. No one does it like Vera! NO ONE! She makes the rest of Kenyan “socilaites’ look like watoto wa nursery. Money? Check. Beauty? Check. Ass? Check. Glamour? Check. Swag? Check. Allure? Check. Charm? Check. Damn,SHE GOT IT ALL! Long Live Vee S Beiby!

PRINCESS: Huddah Monroe. Most Beautiful Woman in East Africa…so sweet,comely,adorable,likable,sexy,cute and so sweet You could eat her up. And that smile…Awwwww. One little Princess. Our little Princess.

KINGDOM: POP

KING: Nameless. Besides Wyre,Nameless is the only other Kenyan Musician that seems to be popular all across Africa. From Nigeria to South Africa to Congo to Tanzania to Ghana. They all have heard of Nameless. And love his Music. Uliza Flavour….He’s been in the Industry for almost 20 Yeras. And is still as relevant as ever! Damn!

QUEEN: Amani. I don’t know what to say about  Amani. I seriously don’t.  Honestly,I am NOT even her fan. And i’d rather contract Ebola than be locked in a small room playing Amani’s music. But Hey,She is the Queen! Come what may!

PRINCESS: Avril. Again,I have NOTHING positive to say about her. And her music?? Cant stand it! But Hey,she da Princess,You Know!

 

KINGDOM: : DANCEHALL

KING(1): Wyre. Everyone knows that. Including My unborn child.

KING(2): Redsan. Just like Beyonce and Rihanna and Katy Perry and Lady Gaga share the Queen of Pop title,so does Wyre and Redsan share the KING OF DANCEHALL title. And if You ask Me,Redsan is actually wayyyyyyyy better than Wyre. But then again,Wyre is wayyyyy tooo hot,too relevant,too happening,too everywhere and too international. So,Here we have NO King or Prince. They are BOTH KINGS!

 

KINGDOM: GOSPEL

KING: Daddy Owen. He is the King of Kapungala. And King of Hit songs. And King of Catchy Beats. And King of Endorsements. And King of Charisma. And King of Money. And King of Gospel. Uko na swali????

QUEEN: Esther Wahome. She is the reason we have Emmy Kosgei. And also the reason we have Jimmy Gait. Both of whom call her MOTHER. Respect Your Mothers,the Bible Says. Esther has been doing this for decades. And is still fresh and beautiful and hot. Just like 1994..When she started. All hail the Queen!

PRINCE: Bahati. Oh so sweeeet Bahati.

 

KINGDOM: ACTING

KING: There are too many Kings here…Ken Ambani,Raymond Wafula,Mzee Ojwang,Mwala,Ondiek nik’akwota,Papa Shirandula…Man,I cant decide who is King here. I just cant! Its sacrilegious.

QUEEN: Mwakamzee Mwatela. Most respected Actress in the game. Most respected. No questions about that.

PRINCE: Nick Mutuma. Am I a fan?? NO.Does he deserve the title??? Absolutely. If I was a woman,I would start gushing about his “looks”,but now that I am a dude,His looks don’t mean shit to me.

GODMOTHER: Mama Kayai. She’s been doing this from the 70’s. And is still doing it to date. NO ONE does it like the Good Ol’ Mama. No one!

 

KINGDOM: DANCE

KING: Kanda King. Yup,he is.

QUEEN: Toxic. Why is she on this list?? I have NO idea. But then again,there is NO other credible female dancer in Kenya. However,Toxic has so far quit dancing and now spends her time raising her son and repenting her past sins to God.  Either way,she is still Tha Queen.

 

KINGDOM: RATCHETNESS

KING: Blaqy. He gave You the song “Shake What Your Mama Gave Ya” and a video featuring the Bootylicious Risper Faith. Kenya has NEVER recovered from watching that video. NEVER!

QUEEN: Some ka-socialite I wont name. Hehe

 

KINGDOM:BALLING—MONEY. (MAKING IT RAIN)

KING: Jaguar. Damn! Jaguar got more money than Burundi’s Annual GDP. Nigga makes it rain harder than flash floods in Budalang’i. All he does is pour Money…anywhere and everywhere. Plus he parties with the Mightiest and Most Powerful people on the Land. Wayyyy toooo much Money. Baller,NUMBER ONE! Salute to tha King!

QUEEN: I hate to announce to You that Vera Sidika is about to appear on this list…AGAIN! And, Yes,she has! Vera has Money. Imagined or real,It doesn’t matter. No woman balls harder than Queen Vera. Girl got money. Real,cold money. She balls like a Mexican Drug lord.

 

KINGDOM: SOCIAL MEDIA

KING(FACEBOOK): I want to put my name in there…I really do…But I don’t know how to do this without offending Churchill.. Ok…I will leave that open. For You to judge for Yourselves. But,are You sure there is No way I can fix my name here?? 100% sure?? Without seeming biased??? Are You sure??? Haha.

KING(TWITTER): SOMA Awards is happening on the 3rd of October. Ngojeni mtaambiwa.

 

KINGDOM: FASHION.

KING: First and foremost,I know NOTHING about Fashion. Absolutely NOTHING. So You can choose to jump this category…But still,I feel that the King should be Ian Mugoya. Correct Me if I am wrong.

QUEEN: Sharon Mundia of This is Ess. I have a crush on Sharon. But that doesn’t mean I made her Queen because of the crush. Sharon is the MOST Beautifully dressed Woman in Kenya. Even the goats in Loitoktok know that.

 

KINGDOM: CONTROVERSY

KING: Robert Alai. I wont add anything on that. I just won’t. Robert is the Boss of Attention. And he does a pretty good job.

QUEEN: Good Lord….I hate to announce another disturbing thing to You…that Vera Sidika is about to make a THIRD appearance on this article! Well…she already has! Queen of Controversy?? Queen Vera. Don’t ask me why. You already know.

GODMOTHER: Toxic. Before Vera was born,there was a woman who invented the word “Controversy” Her name?? Toxic. The Dancer.

 

KINGDOM: BANDS.

KINGS: Sauti Sol. Sauti Sol are NOT only the BEST BAND in Kenya,But also the Best Band in Africa! Best Best Best Best! No one can eclipse them. No one! Not even Mafikizolo. No one!

GODFATHERS: Kayamba Africa. Most popular and widely-beloved Authentic Kenyan Band. Kayamba Africa has played in 90% of all Kenyan Weddings. All Hail,Kayamba!

 

KINGDOM: ENTERTAINMENT JOURNALISTS.

KING: Smitta Smitten. I dont need to add a thing. Smitta is Tha King. And forever will be!

QUEEN: Ummmmm…..No idea. Too tricky.

 

KINGDOM: AFRO-FUSION

KING: Eric Wainaina. Also the Overall King of Kenyan Music.

QUEEN: Suzanna Owiyo. She has performed for Everyone. Allover the World. Performed for Oprah Winfrey too…Nothing screams Queen than that! Nothing!

PRINCESS: Della. Or Nina Ogot. Its a tie here.

PRINCE: Anto Neo Soul. And everyone say AMEN.

 

 

KINGDOM: COMEDY

KING: Eric Omondi. I know,I know…Many of You expected Churchill…But kuweni wapole. For Me,Eric takes this one. Hands Down. He has recently held two very powerful solo Comedy shows titled “Untamed” performing on stage to thousands of comedy lovers at Carnivore. For close to 2 Hours! Alone! And still is the most sought after comedian by Corporates in Kenya. He is Tha Almighty King!

QUEEN: There is NO QUEEN here. And we may NEVER have one. Ever!

PRINCE: Sleepy. He’s popping. He’s downright hilarious. He’s witty. He is painfully cheeky.

GODFATHER: Churchill. Or Mwalimu King’ang’i. Churchill is MORE than a King. Churchill is a GOD. A Godfather. He is the reason 99% of Kenya’s comics have a career. He made the KING OF Comedy,Eric. He is the BEST in the Game. Best,Best Ever. He is the GOD. Of Comedy. Bow Down. And remove thy shoes….Churchill is the Greatest of them All. Infact,Churchill is THE FATHER OF ALL KENYAN Entertainment! Yes,I said it! Kill Me Now.

 

I have said too much already,right???

Is there a category I have left out??? Lemmi know. For now,those are THE KINGS AND QUEENS up in this Bitch! Bow down to them!

 

Recent development has seen M-Net and Endemol South Africa re-instate Rwanda as a participating country in Big Brother Hotshots.

Rwandese have all the reasons to be happy as their country can now finally have a representative at the Big Brother Hotshots down in South Africa. The re-instatement is as a result of the delay in production which led to adequate time being available to process the necessary documentation for the housemates to participate in the reality show.

Let us wait and see what excitement Rwandese will bring onto Africa’s biggest reality show as the build-up to the launch has continued to spur more anxiety ahead of the D-Day which is set to be on Sunday the 5^th of October. More information on: www.bigbrotherafrica.com

 

People are still talking about one of the grandest parties this year. The party was held about 10 days ago but people cannot help but talk about it due to its sheer epic-ness.

Skyluxx’s owner Amor Thige recently threw a fabulous all white party where all the revellers were expected to wear pristine white. Bloggers, marketers, TV presenters, socialites, models, radio presenters, actors name them. People from all walks of life and all kinds of jobs were there. The party was so impressive that Kamlesh Pattni could not resist it

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photos:Ebony Lounge

Everything that has a beginning definitely has an ending too; the reign of Babu Owino as the students’ leader at the University of Nairobi is coming to an end at completion n of his term in office.

He is definitely one of the most outspoken leaders that Kenya’s most prestigious university has ever had; the eloquent and courageous Babu has been loved and hated almost at an equal measure. A darling of students but a nightmare to the like of HELB CEO Charles Ringera and Education cabinet secretary Prof. Jacob Kaimenyi. It may be a reprieve for the latter to know that Babu will be no longer seeking to defend his seat at the helm of SONU as he is planning to fry bigger fish.

Babu through his official Facebook page noted that he would not be vying for SONU chairmanship position as he will officially be joining the national politics. He has not disclosed what party he will be joining but sure Nairobi University will miss a guy with such vigor.

 

Chris Kirubi’s tweet to Amina Abdi has caused quite the tempest on social media .This is because it is unusual for your boss to reprimand you in  a sub tweet, no matter how cool or tech savvy he is.

Chris Kirubi has since apologised to Amina and it seems that peace has been restored to the Capital F.M kingdom. But in usual Kenyan fashion this eccentric tweet has triggered some funny reactions, check a few of them out:

 

Oliver Generali Mathenge is a step closer to closing the deal on his fiancé; the journalist from the Star newspaper recently paid “ruracio” a likely indication that the wedding bells are ringing.

It is the most difficult moment for any man who wants to settle down with someone’s daughter; I am talking about the bride’s price. Oliver successfully paid the dowry for his fiancé Njeri Wamarite in a colorful ceremony that was recently held at Njeri’s parents home. The eventful was lively and for all of you who missed it; here is the photo gallery:

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Bosses too do regret when they realise they have stepped on the wrong wire! So is Chris Kirubi.

In an early article, we revealed how Kirubi had publicly taken a jibe at his employee at Capital FM, Amina aka Tumi’s Mum.

But the tycoon seems to be regretting every word he tweeted directed to the radio queen for her associations with Coke Studio Africa.

And the entire weekend seems to have been full of reconciliatory activities as the employer is pictured mending the cracks he had created with his employee.

Yes, it is called damage control. And damage control can be in any form, including this one here.

In the beginning was Toxic and Toxic was twerking and shaking her bum even before some of these pretty young things had left high school.

She was the original socialite and I remember watching her at a concert which was sponsored by Juicy Fruit and she was shaking it and popping it like it was going out of style. Toxic was THE video vixen and THE socialite.

After high school, Toxic decided that Doctor and Lawyer were too mainstream and dancing was the way to go. Back then, Toxic was among the few girls willing to pursue dancing in videos as a way of earning a living and being as lithe and limber as she is, she was bound to attract unwanted attention. From musicians who thought that they could get to tap. Toxic opens up about being a Video vixen and trying to maintain her dignity in a world where ‘sex sells’

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