Ghafla April Fools Stories!
So yesterday was April fools and Baba Ghafla and i pulled a couple fast ones on you. But na joke tings. So stop sending me angry emails and facebook messages. This na joke tings. But away from the people who have the sense of humour of a cadaver and on to those that knew to take the jokes with a light touch. Allow me to clarify which stories were half truths and which were outright lies.
Outright Lies
#1. Getrude Mungai getting divorced. That was straight B.S. I actually hope nothing but the best for their union. I love that she is liberal and willing to experiment with sex. Kenyan girls half her age still go for the dead cockroach style… Bleurgh!
#2. Marya 7 months pregnant. Uhm… Yeah, that was a lie i pulled out of my gluteus maximus. And no, that is not a Roman emporer.
#3. Jaguar’s government appointment. Do i look like i have president elect’s ear on such matters? Really? Read up on civic matters and find out just why this was an outright lie.
#4. Julie Gichuru joining K24. She has reiterated that she will still be at Citizen for quite some time to come.
#5. Robert Alai getting arrested. I don’t know where the chap spent hisEaster but i do know it wasn’t from behind bars. And Kenya has not gone back to the Nyayo torture chambers days of Daniel Toroitich Arap Moi. Last i checked, the constitution protected Freedom of Speech. So we can look forward to more tweets about Kileleshwa residents being raped and otherwise terrorised a and more Chimwami sex scandals.
#6. Raila and Uhuru working on a peace song. Unless the funny lot at XYZ are behind that, i wouldn’t hold my breathe.
#7. Dennis Itumbi being primed to become the government spokesman. Yeah… Thing is… That slot was already filled.
Half Truths
#2. TNA bringing Rick Ross to Kenya. Uhm… I’m not responsible for starting these rumours and they’ve been circulating for over two weeks now. Time will tell though.
