Honestly, Instead Of Wasting Time On Movies Such As Fifty Shades Of Grey, Here Are Five Things That Should Really Be Banned In Kenya
It seems the Kenya Film Classification Board loves promoting piracy. In early 2014, they banned’ The Wolf Of Wall Street’, an Oscar nominated movie, from screening in the 254. As a result, almost everyone watched the movie, including grandmothers and kids. The ban only begot curiosity and desire to witness the proceeding of the film. Even people who hadn’t watched movies for decades did everything possible to get a copy.
This year, the movie ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’, has suffered the same fate. It’s a motion picture based on the ‘Fifty Shades Trilogy’ books.E.L James, the woman behind the three books from which the movie is based, is even the highest earning author of the decade.
Fifty Shades Of Gray is an erotic movie but it isn’t an evil movie. There’s no justifiable reason in banning it. It could have made for a great Valentine’s screening for adults in cinemas. I believe that the movie has an age restriction and cinemas could have adhered to that. There have been more explicit films than Fifty Shades and Wolf Of Wall Street.
We have much bigger problems in Kenya. There are things that should really be banned. Things such as these:
The use of fake accents
We’ve all encountered people who talk with fake accents just to fit in but then in the middle of the conversation, their true accent betrays them. Culprits include Nairobi chics that are either in campus or working in high-end offices. Their speech is loaded with absurd accents yet they just come from Karatina, Kabartonjo or Bungoma. It’s only fair that you stick to your lanes please. The other culprits are those guys that only came to Nairobi when they joined campus or when they got a job. But then they speak like they are the inventors of sheng. Calm your balls bros.There’s no medal for saying buda or mzito in every sentence.
Putting black tattoos on dark skin
Goddamn. . If your skin is too dark, like kiwi black there’s really no need to put a tattoo. No hard feelings. It’s not like your heart won’t beat without one. Man, you are dark, then you brave several hours of pain to put black tattoos on your skin and all you are left looking like is a human with many scars. You end up looking like an African warrior who fought In battles such as the Maji Maji rebellion and got pierced by countless spears.
Slow walkers
Slow walking in public streets should be banned. It derails the economy’s progress. I really don’t understand why some people walk as slow as an 18th century criminal who’s going to be hanged at the gallows. Move quickly please. You don’t own the road
The word ‘nayo’
‘Nayo’ has become outdated but some people use it after every sentence like it’s the word AMEN. Come on. Ati kuchoka nayo, kujibamba nayo, kushiba nayo. Get the hell out of here.
Posting food pictures on Instagram
Uuum….we know you went to KFC and ate chicken steak but there’s no need to give us evidence. I mean, we are not the FBI or something. We don’t need proof that you had a sumptuous meal. There’s a lot of people in this country who have daily meals that are prepared by the world’s best chefs, but they don’t go posting a string of photos all over social media. Ban dem
