Maina and King’ang’i In The Morning: Wives Who Deny Men “ParePare”

So today Maina and King’angi in the morning were discussing the issue of wives who deny their husbands their conjugal rights.

This convo stems from a lady who called in to complain that whenever she tell her husband that she doesn’t want to have sex, he demands it saying it’s his human right seeing as he’s married and he didn’t pay dowry for nothing.
And today’s conversation had all the lads in the office tuned in and paying attention. We at Ghafla tend to agree that when a man pays dowry, he has “bought” his wife, self same way a man walks into the supermarket and pays for deodorant.
And the men who called in also shared this view. Dowry is no longer about showing “appreciation”, it is just another method of extorting money from the potential son-in-law. But that’s just how I see things. The men who called in were hard put to understand why their wives would deny them sex after they’ve paid dowry then “dey vex” (get angry) when the men step out of their marital beds.

But one female caller called in and I couldn’t help but laugh at what she said. Apparently, she’s a second wife to a man who is well off but the man is “too demanding” as she put it. And all this is inspite of the fact that he hasn’t paid dowry for her but he does indeed take care of her in every aspect a man should for his wife. The first wife must be getting her seven chuckles in!
Another female caller said that men need to understand that these days women work and the threat about not paying rent and the bills is a non issue. Also it’s not a persistent problem because sometimes women are sick or on their periods. Are there any Red Sea pirates out there hmmmm?
A female caller called in next to advise men to wait until the woman is relaxed like on a Saturday night or Sunday afternoon. And at that point someone in the office asked whether a man pays dowry for limited access.
The next caller was a man who advised men to simply stop asking. Apparently, this formula has worked wonders for him because he gets sex frequently and it comes with no strings attached. And at this point allow me to go off on a tangent: I agree with this chap! Demand and supply is an economic principle that rules supreme over various aspects of our lives, sex included.
The next caller was a female who I believe thus far to be the only female caller who had a point worth speaking out. According to her, her man is “too big”. She cannot take daily attention thus needs a day or two to recuperate and prepare… And here I always thought women enjoyed constant attention from endowed men.
Seriously though, I will never understand women for as long as I walk the earth. They constantly call in to berate King’ang’i about useless Kenyan men yet when they have men who do not shirk their responsibilities; rent, school fees, food, DOWRY, they deny him sex and possibly bring home a lesser man’s offspring?
A man called in to say that his neighbour get home and merely wraps his towel everyone on the plot knows the woman shall gerrit! And this happens everyday! He even follows his wife to the shower on some occasions and asks, “Mama nani, bado? Nina ngoja!” That is a good woman and an excellent wife!
Another man called in to say that he didn’t marry a wife for her to come and regulate the sex they are to have! His wife left her family to join him as man and wife at the expense of several head of livestock and as such he will partake of her fruit whenever he deems fit. Cosign!
And the final word? Well, it was had by a woman who called in to say women are wrong to deny their women then they complain that their men are going out to look for sex from “clandes”! Her man on the other hand has no excuse because he gets it whenever he asks. And this is a woman who knows how to keep the home stable and strong!