THE LIST: 15 Kenyan Female Celebrities Who Must Be Really ‘Freaky’ In Bed (+18)

DISCLAIMER: All the information on this article is my opinion and not that of Ghafla. Reader discretion is advised

In this great nation, there are female celebrities that men can’t get enough of. These are the women every man wants to bed. Unfortunately, due to this thing called ‘lanes’, they remain well thought-out fantasies. This is an article for team mafisi and Zero chills members. If you know your feelings meter is too high, kindly step aside. These are the Kenyan celebrities most likely to make you leave your wife.

DJ Pierra Makena

Some say her voice is like that of an Greek goddess. Others say it’s like that of the ancient seductress Cleopatra. I say it’s perfect. Pierra has ‘Sauti ya kuitoa ‘shuma’ pangoni.’ And let me not even talk about the young deejay’s beauty.

Huddah

if we are to judge the book by its cover, Huddah (the Amber Rose wannabe) is the woman most likely to take a man on a real steeplechase. By the time you are done with her, you’ll be feeling like you were in a boxing match with Floydd ‘Money’ Mayweather. The ony problem is that she has a taxi punani.

Victoria Kimani

My future ‘bae’ if everything goes right. This is the woman that has Nigerian men drooling over her and singing her name in songs. For example,  in the song ‘Runtown’ where Davido and Gallardo talk of how a certain girl is fine like Victoria Kimani. At least we are in continental agreement that this chocolate city artiste is gold.

Marya

Pass me some water please. Marya is the kind of woman who’ll make you feel as good as an Arsenal fan who has seen his team finish in fourth place at the end of the season. She has the curves, the face and the ‘come and get me’ persona about her.

Eve D’Souza

The former Hits Not Homework host was every teenage boy’s wet dream back in the day. And guess what? She still is.

Miss Karun

The former Camp Mulla member clearly portrays those surburb chics. The Karen, Lavington and Kileleshwa chics who are always down for anything, including strawberries, wine and ‘Fifty Shades Of grey’ kind of stuff.

Habida

Of course she has to be freaky. In her song Kesho, she sang about being ready today and not being able to wait until tomorrow. Like she wants it right now. Imagine that

Corazon Kwamboka

She’s the woman that’ll have you saying ASSante. Corazon is more ‘bootyfull’ than ‘beautiful’ but It’s fine. One doesn’t always have to look at the face to enjoy the phase. So long as you flee before her makeup comes off, you’ll be good.

Sarah ‘Tanya’ Hassan

The former Tahidi High actress and current Wedding Show host possesses those pearl-like eyes that make you want to switch off the lights, because you are assured that the room will still shine.

Lupita Ny’ongo

Of course she couldn’t be left out. Our National treasure boasts a string of Hollywood ninjas knocking each other over just to get close to her. By just looking at her lips, you’ll easily know that she’s a ‘head-master’. If you know what i mean. Or should i say ‘head’-mistress?

Sharon Mundia

Another glass of water please. Sharon not only has a killer fashion sense but also the perfect body. She pays attention to detail. Interestingly, research has shown that all people who pay attention to detail in public life also pay attention to detail in the bedroom. Ooof

Stella Mwangi

Is it just me or does STL look really flexible? Hii biashara acha tu niachie hapo

Sanaipei Tande

She teased us in a bathtub in the ‘Mfalme wa Mapenzi’ video. Oh yes she caused Vaseline sales to skyrocket.

Lilian Muli

I know what you did last summer Lilian. Yes, with a certain Jamaican heartthrob on national TV. Hatujasahau.

Vera Sidika

Goddamn that wicked smile. Vera looks like that woman the bible warned you about but you still wanna go ahead and devour her. She has such a strong spell on mankind that we all ignore her misdemeanors and glorify her plastic beauty.