ZERO CHILLS…Here’s The Difference Between Kenya’s Bleach Queen Vera Sidika And Uganda’s Boss Lady Zari Hassan

So Vera has opened a high end salon, prompting another gut-wrenchingly nauseating avalanche of Sidika-mania in the media and general populace.

My friend Sally opened a salon in Westlands too the other week but no one featured her on Ghafla or Pulse. She’s 22, still in campus and has a higher net-worth than me. She’s self-made. Whether young people like these deserve more focus than Vera is a debate for another day. Let’s talk about Uganda’s main chic Zari in comparison to our own Mrs. Modifications aka ‘Booty Momma’

Being socialites, both of them have engaged in antics that propelled them into the kind of instant, gigantic cyberspace notoriety that can either crush a woman or make her so strong and impervious to criticism.

But who’s better than the other?

Beauty

Vera doesn’t seem like the kind of woman that would weather the mists of time quite successfully- mainly due to the grotesque levels of plastic surgery and bleaching that she has subjected herself too. Her boobies look like they constantly need to be refilled with ‘pumzi’ In 10 or 15 years’ time, I wonder what she’ll look like. Honestly her beauty pales in insignificance compared to Zari’s. She’s kinda like the Hollywood folk who constantly go under the knife in pursuit of eternal youth but then they end up ugly AF.

Let’s not forget that Vera is a fake light skinned woman while Zari is a natural born light skin. Despite having kids, Uganda’s boss lady looks as radiant today as she did a few years back.

Relationships with men

Zari has a real boyfriend who also happens to be East Africa’s biggest artiste while Vera has imaginary Nigerian boyfriends. The Ugandan socialite seems to be reading from Kim Kardashian’s play book. She has wooed Diamond like an ancient Greek goddess, causing the media to go into overdrive. Blogs have latched into her romantic affair with the singer, relishing each detail with gusto. The good thing is that she’s decent at least in that she propagates the values of romance and being faithful to one partner

Vera on the other hand can’t prove whether she is indeed dating or she’s just a basic bish relying on handouts and donations from several ‘unknown’ men. If she really has a Nigerian boyfriend as she so claims, why haven’t we seen him? Is he ashamed of her or he simply doesn’t exist.

Realness

Some might argue that Vera is real. She should be lauded for her ability to kick critics in the groin. Despite the negativity, she stays strong and in this way she gets more fans. The internet can be a brutal, unforgiving, colosseum of rage, hatred and vile disgusting abuse and the Kenyan socialite has resisted all that. However, to me she is the biggest phoney in show business – a ruthlessly cynical commercial machine prepared to stoop just below any bar of ludicrous behavior if it’ll enhance her brand or flog a few more likes on her pictures. She has been bashed for an endless number of indiscretions but still continues to thrive on them.

Zari is real, laid back and rolls like a boss. Apart from her affairs with men, you are unlikely to hear disgusting news about her. She simply doesn’t rely on negative publicity to shine light on her image.

Wealth

Zari owns a fleet of foreign cars, mansions and businesses. She has bodyguards, ‘Birdman’ kind of jewelry and Paris Hilton kind of attire. More so she doesn’t brag about it. Unlike someone I know, she doesn’t take pictures smiling like ‘The Joker’ every time she goes into a Louis Vuitton shop.

In the eyes of the general public, Vera seems like she’s living the life but I strongly believe that beneath the contented smile and charming demeanor, there are mental scars of a very different woman. What she goes through to get the little things she flosses around, only the guardian angels know. The only real wealth Vera can boast off is the headlines and likes.

Every time she posts a picture on Instagram, Kenyans scramble to view, disseminate, debate and deliberate over the single most examined and infamous derriere in our country’s history. Good for her. You are rich Vera. You are f***n rich.