Month: February 2013

After all the drama that surrounded her death, family, friends and colleagues of Nigeria’s Afro pop singer, Oluwabimpe Susan Harvey, popularly known as Goldie Harvey, yesterday paid their last respect to the singer as she was was laid to rest Yesterday Monday February 25th at a private funeral held at Vaults and Gardens cemetery in Ikoyi, Lagos.

The late singer, whose remains were placed in a brown MIC Casket, was brought into the premises in a R350 Mercedes Benz hearse at around 10:00am. Despite a host of Nigerian celebs attending the funeral, Prezzo was conspicuously missing, as earlier reported. Take a look;

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Goldie’s husband, Andrew Harvey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

May Goldie’s soul rest in eternal peace

 

Props: Nigerian Eye, Linda Ikeji, Kennel Music

Insyder have scoured through their archives. and they have searched high, they have searched low. They have searched far, and they have searched wide. They have searched and finally, they have found. And just what have they found? Well, they have found a photograph of the fabulous Mirfat before all the diva vibe checked in.

And my oh my! Mirfat was looking ratchet. And to think she subjected a poor lad to torment and abuse about his sweater… his skin colour, his pocket (why you tryba count a ninja’s money?) and finally, his plastic money. Kenyans are an unforgiving lot indeed! From memes of Madharau Mirfat to making her do the ugly dance and now to exposing hidden X-files.

Madharau Mirfat, this is you before the hubris and make-up:

 

By now you have probably heard about the demise of the last head of the disbanded ECK, Samuel Kuvuitu.

 

After a long sad battle with throat cancer, his body unfortunately gave in and he was no more.

Get the detailed story on his death right here.

 

Meanwhile, this was the last interview that Samuel Kuvuitu ever did, days before his death.

Watch the video below.

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Attacks and counter-attacks is what characterized the second and final round of the presidential debate for all the eight aspirants. With TNA’s Uhuru Kenyatta making a U-turn and confirming his participation after earlier on writing a letter withdrawing from the debate, it was sure going to be hot like coal.

And sweltering it was! With the belligerent land issue on the table, the debate saw finger-pointing and subsequent rejoinders reign in.  The unyielding moderators took to task the main contenders on issues corruption considering their names have been mentioned adversely in some grand graft cases.

Other than that, the presidential candidates engaged each other on matters regarding post-election violence and their role in reforms. With only six days left for Kenyans to go to the ballot, the eight candidates promised to improve the lives of Kenyans with much focus being on implementation of the Constitution, fighting poverty through job creation, education and a renewed war on graft.

Here’s the full debate courtesy of NTV;

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The news of someone’s passing is often met with sorrow and sombreness. It is a tragic occurrence and even though it is a surety even more so than death, the blow of death is not dulled on bit. The death of Samuel Kivuitu’s death rent the internets last night to alot of mixed reactions.

Some offered messages of condolence to his family. Others of Robert Alai’s ilk toasted the news. This is unAfrican and actually inhumane. Robert Alai chose to toast the death asthough he had been eagerly awaiting news of Kivuitu’s death with excitement. But what can you expect from the likes of Robert Alai who posts false stories and starts rumours in a juvenile attempt to get attention from people? Someone who prays for Kileleshwa residents to be violently robbed and the women raped?

I just realized i am guilty of giving him too much airtime…. Damn. I’m done. But before i go, here’s what Alai posted:

“So my sources were right that Kivuitu died? After Kihara Mutu, he needed to die so quickly. We couldn’t go for elections with Kivuitu alive.”

 

I’m impressed by the fact that most of the commentors sought to admonish the fool… Now brace yourselves for another picture of me at some event i didn’t go to to turn up on the internets. I’m quivering.

Ladies and gentlemen, it is with a heavy heart and alot of regret that i inform you of Samuel Kivuitu’s demise. The man who was the last head of the disbanded ECK (Electoral Commission of Kenya) is no more.

I remember only a couple of weeks ago being shocked by the photographs of the late Samuel Kivuitu looking emaciated and sickly as he battled throat cancer. He died last night at MP Shah Hospital aged 74.

According to information we have received, Kivuitu was at the hospital for a routine check up before he collapsed and was then rushed to the ICU. His body will be transferred to the Lee Funeral home awaiting burial. May his soul rest in peace. Amen.

The Pan African Film Festival has handed Nairobi Half Life‘s director an award.

Tosh Gitonga directorial debut has earned him a Best Director for a First Feature Award at the annual festival which seeks to present and showcase a broad spectrum of Black creative works, particularly those that reinforce positive images, help to destroy negative stereotypes and depict an expanded vision of the Black experience.

The 23rd edition of the festival took place between 7th and 18th of this month and showed 154 films, representing 34 countries. They included 23 documentaries, 13 short documentaries, 67 narrative features and 51 narrative shorts.

This is just one of the many awards Kenya’s official entry to the 85th edition of the Academy Awards. It has won awards at Durban International Film Festival, American Film Institute Fest and Kalasha Awards among others.

So Friday’s edition of the dating show Tujuane has kicked up a right storm. There was a girl on there called Mirfat Musa, who was arrogant to say the least. She had standards that only a French prince could match.

A Tweep called droid254 came up with a few funny images of her, and I thought why not make this a meme and open it up to the whole public to make their own versions? 

So here goes. Presenting MADHARAU MIRFAT: a meme representative of middle-class Kenyan girls who feel too good for their own good. Here is the meme template:

And you can create your own versions here: http://memegenerator.net/Madharau-Mirfat (no login needed)

Here are some examples of some ‘Madharau Mirfat’ memes created so far:

 

 

 

Mirfat, hell hath no fury like a Kenyan scorned! Never ever talk about any of your fellow Kenyans with scorn! For those of you not in the know about what this article is about, i’m referring to Mirfat the lass from Friday’s episode of Tujuane. The lass with alot of “madharau”.

Kenyans have refused to forgive her obnoxious and douchebag statements and are still going H.A.M on her! Kratos would be so proud! But away from God Of War, i want to give you a link to what some creative Kenyan has created just to share the humour with my niblings! Here it is, from your dede Chim Tuna:

http://theuglydance.com/?v=bvrsanckvd

Follow the link! I promise you it’ll be worth your time!

KTN have done it again with another scathing documentary about the underworld of Kenyan life.

KTN have forged a niche in the investigative journalism niche, with them being known for their Jicho Pevu series by award winning journalists John Allan-Namu and Mohammed Ali. Now there’s a brand new rising star named Angel Katusia who has thrown herself into the mix. Her name is and she has come out with a hard-hitting investigative piece on the family business that is prostitution in Kenya’s coastal region.

In this expose, we see coastal mothers selling their daughters off to various suitors for a night of pleasure. The price range is shocking. Offers were varying from 100 bob, 80 bob, 70 bob, and even the low, low price of 50 shillings! 

To make matters worse, these were 7-8 year olds that were being auctioned off. As if these small girls are supposed to know di ting!

And that’s not the worst part! The worst part is that the venue for this senseless debauchery was not a room, not even an animal’s stable, but in the clear, open bush! This combination of sexploitation, child labour and human rights abuse was happening in front of the camera’s glare!

The reasons given for these acts of desperation were lack of money and dependency on drugs. Both being at epidemic proportions in the coast

For those of you interested in seeing the whole action for yourself, Angel Katusia captured it in the following video:

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Looks like the Jubilee candidate will take the podium tonight at the debate.

Even today, the day of the final presidential debate, there were still doubts as to whether Uhuru Kenyatta would make an appearance on what promises to be one of the year’s biggest TV events.

Uhuru, through a statement, had earlier announced that he had dropped out of tonight’s debate after the first one, which took place two weeks ago, had turned out to be more of a roast for him.

He, together with his closest rival, Raila Odinga, also failed to show up for the church-organized presidential debate at the All Saints Cathedral last week. The debate, which is the last, comes a few days after Uhuru was said to be the leading presidential candidate after an opinion poll by Ipsos Synovate.

The debate will be shown across eight leading TV networks and 32 radio stations. This round of the debate will be moderated by Citizen TV’s Uduak Amimo and KTN‘s Joe Ageyo who take over from Citizen‘s Linus Kaikai and Julie Gichuru from the first ever presidential debate.

They say he is a man of many talents and occupations. He has been there, done that, and done it again.

Check out Eric Omondi doing what he does best when not on stage.

They say every good thing must come to an end. And the story of the life of the beautiful and precious Goldie is no different. It’s sad that it was cut short but atleast we have the memories that will live on. Goldie’s husband was denied a visa late last week but it seems that he was able to solve those issues in time as he was by his wife’s side today saying his last goodbyes.

 It is sad however that Andrew Leonard Harvey refused to allow Prezzo the same mercies but that na life-o! It was a sad and sombre affair as Goldie was finally laid to rest. Here are some photographs of her husband bidding her farewell. May she rest in eternal peace in the bossom of the Almighty!

 

Ladies and gentlemn, it has begun! Actually, it begun way earlier but the point is, Kenyans have begun to creatively troll Mirfat of the Tujuane dating show fiasco. And i’m going to share with you the funniest and the most creatively done meme. Why? Well, because nephews and neices, i am your Uncle Chim Tuna. Your Uncle cannot laugh alone can he?

 And i present to you:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I watched this episode and couldn’t help but roll on the floor laughing like a madman! This has to be the best episode aired on Kenyan TVs this entire year! All 2 months of the year anyway! For those of you not in the know, Tujuane is a dating show that seeks to bring two individuals desperate enough to appear on telly together for a date and potentially a relationship thereafter.

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 And good God this episode was one for the hall of shame! The show introduced George, a lad from Kasarani who was hooked up with Mirfat, a beautiful lass from the leafy surbubs of South C.

I shan’t go into too much details about that but what i will say is that the date was a disaster because of the lass’ behaviour. What a dreadful affair for the poor lad. But i got to thinking and i wondered which type of lass this girl would be if you met her at the club. Remember i did a piece about that last year? Read about it here.

Anyway, by my estimates, this Mirfat would be Ms. Gold Digger and Ms. Time Waster. Why? Well, she can clearly afford to drink what she orders for but she cannot pronounce it and thinks it’s posh to order nonetheless. She’ll order for Cognac and call it Konyagi! This lass on Tujuane was just off! How do you talk about the Australian Opening? Australia Opening what? A can of worms? Andy Mureithi shuddered when you confused him with Andy Murray!

And why was she so persistent about putting poor George down? And for the record, plastic money is the way to go. Uncle Chim Tuna only pays his bills with plastic cards! I smell a meme coming on… Madharau Mirfat!

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Tujuane is probably the biggest show on TV right now, and Friday’s episode solidified that fact.

They recently unveiled a new host and had one of their biggest shows ever last Friday. The date was between George, a DOP and production shop owner and Mirfat, a high-class chips intolerant Julie Gichuru employee. The episode’s hashtag (#tujuane) trended not only locally but worldwide.

The debate about Mirfat’s conduct on the show and condolences to George are still pouring in today. If you missed the 8:00 p.m. KTN showing of the 12th episode, they have finally put it up online. You can check it out today.
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Ladies and gentlemen, today we bid farewell to Goldie Harvey. The family has just issued word that Goldie shall be laid to rest today in a ceremony that will be closed off except to her close friends, associates and ofcourse, family members.

Attendance of the event will be only for those invited and she will be funeral today at Vaults & Gardens private burial ground located at Ikoyi. The service is  scheduled to begin at 10am (local time) this morning and it is set to start with hyms and songs.

Cameras will not be allowed and anyone spotting one will be denied access to the ceremony. We here at Ghafla bid farewell to Goldie. Ka Omesia!