Month: February 2014

She’s best remembered for her time on Tusker Project Fame 3, where she emerged a finalist, and for being one of the Tusker All Stars in 2011. However, her radio gig at One FM propelled her further into stardom making her a household name in the Kenyan showbiz scene. She’s the stunning Patricia Kihoro.

And now two years after being off the airwaves, Patricia is ready to put on her headphones and head into the studio. Recently, in an interview with Pressplay, the fiery singer turned actress is headed to HBR (Homeboyz Radio).

 

 

Screen Grab from “Coming Home”, Sauti Sol’s video

 

Patricia said she has landed a new show at the up-town radio station dubbed, “Afrocentric” and will be airing once a week; on Saturdays only.

Patricia & Calvo Mistari in their song ‘Loving Wrong’

Apart from being an actress, singer, and radio personality Patricia likes to dabble in writing and photography.

She has since worked on several TV show pilots, playing “Mona” on Demigods; “Aisha” on Sauti and “Nana” on Rush.

Yesterday I gave you an absolute list of Kenya’s top rappers. I figures that my wisdom would be trusted 100% seeing as I am infallible. I forgot to account for the fact that human beings in accordance with their nature are never satisfied. People are now putting up blog posts and giving me their own lists.

To be honest, that list would only have had 3 names if I had my way but the Kenyans I work with insisted on having a list of atleast 5 artists. Personally, I found that to be their way of copping out. On ly the best should have made it. And with that, allow me to give you the list I found online that was written by a rapper and blogger who belongs to the collective called DreamTeamVille:

 

 Yesterday, Kenya’s pioneer entertainment website and East Africa’s leading online site did an article about the Top 5 rappers in Kenya. Okay, for a minute they had me going, till they said that Jay A is not on the list because he had recorded a certain song with a production house that is not Hip Hop. I expected Africa’s leading Hip Hop site, carlthatruth.com to respond but since they are not yet back online, <they couldn’t respond to an infallible article such as the work done by Uncle Chim Tuna actually> I will take this opportunity to defend Hip Hop. For starters, never mention Jay A in any Hip hop list, he is not any where close to that. Secondly, Ghafla is no longer a music site, they are more of a business franchise, which I can’t blame them since bills (and Uncle Chim) have to be paid, and writing about music and broke rappers all day will not carter to that. Now onto matters that actually resonate, the list put up by Ghafla should have been titled Top Five mainstream rappers in Kenya. When it comes to Hip Hop, noo son, you aint got your facts right. You can’t mention Kristoff, who was recorded live in a Capital FM cypher revising his written rhymes, alongside Octopizzo <this is news to me and if it is indeed true then he shall be stripped of his position>. That is an insult son. Without further ado, here is the real deal. Keep your mouth open coz you will need that air.

 

5.  SCAR.

Kenyan Hip Hop is more leaned to the Swahili language and Sheng and most successful artist locally are the ones who embrace this languages. Go ahead name whichever you wanna. Scar is part of the group wakadinali and as the group name suggests, they are out to preach that pure Hip Hop. The guy has BARS and punchlines! coincidentally, he is signed to BigBeats Afrik, the same label that house Kaligraph Jones. Get with the program.

<His track is at the bottom of this article>

4. JULIANI

Anyone who knows anything about Hip Hop, especially the Kenyan one will tell you that J is one of the realest lyricist in the game, whether Gospel or just pure concious music, trust this brother to deliver the truth. i give it to Ghafla for at least getting that right

3. VIRUS

Formerly Octopizzo’s right hand man, this the realest shit (pun intended) to come from Kibra. The dude got his freestyle game on lock. Any day anywhere, anytime Virus will battle your favorite rapper and he will win the battle. Ooh yes he will. Virus has got that raw, street gutter flow and lyrics that only real Hip Hop heads like JichodaDog will understand.

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2. KALIGHRAPH JONES

Well, nothing more to be said about the K to the J. if you haven’t yet heard of him, kindly get out of the cave you are living in my guy. prowess aside, he is one of the artists I believe will put our image on the Hip Hop map internationally. Lest I forget, that diss track to Octipizzo was the most foolish thing he ever did. I interact with artists  all around Africa and right now, Zimbabwean MCs are are destined to take over the African rap scene, why? Because they are united. I was more disappointed that ProVoke, one of the illest producers right now, was also amused by the move. wake up guys, there are bigger battles to fight, we need Grammys.

 

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1. KING SHUKID

You wondering why he is King? well, I can’t help your ignorance, Google was created for your lot. Whenever there is a Hip Hop argument and this guys name doesn’t pop up, I always die a small death. I mean, for how long will you dimwits sleep on the kid? Here is the deal, remove the dirt off your ears and get some Shukid on that whack playlist of yours. just a single play and you will be hooked. The brother has THAT Hip Hop attitude that will get Dr. Dre reconsider working with Em’. From being part of Nairobi’s nightmare Coolagang, Shukid can comfortably hold his own.

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0. WANGECHI

Well, under the mentor-ship of provoke, we are witnessing one of the greatest artist to emerge yet from the Kenyan scene. She is the only lady worth being in the group as she brings something unique to the table. That ol’ skool we used to cherish so much from the Lost Boyz may soon be part of our playlist if she continue on the same path. Wangechi is destined for the world stage honestly. That is why she is among the Kings.

Kenyans, if we need to bring that Grammy home, then y’all should reevaluate your priorities as far as music is concerned. Switch whatever is on your playlist and for Christ’s sake, get out the comfort zone and listen to something new. Be open to new sound too. Challenge the deejays and presenters to play you something new. Deviate from the norm damnit!!

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Gospel songstress Emmy Kosgei has shaven off her hair but still looks hot. Emmy endured the huge sacrifice as she was parted from her glossy short black baby dreads.

In her most recent photos, the songbird is rocking short hair; not just short hair, but short natural hair; the sexiest hairstyle a woman can wear. With the short natural hair it means most of the attention is going to be on her beautiful face and Emmy sure has something fierce to give to look at.

Before:

 

 

After:

Emmy rocks nice colourful dangling earrings giving her face some volume while adding that femininity to her face

 

 

 

 

 

Emmy is one the female stars that have taken their hairstyles a step further, shaving their heads completely.

Team weaves should take notes from Emmy.

 

 

Octopizzo was dissed by Khaligraph and everyone went bananas. In part because the diss track was awesome, but also because the target of the diss track is a critically acclaimed bad ass who can handle his own against anyone in a lyrical battle. The moral of today’s lesson ladies and gentlemen is: the boss will always be expected to defend his turf.

I came across a story that was done by mdundo.com about K-Force, another Kibera rap rep was quoted saying:

 

“Of course I’m pushing for Octopizzo to reply personally if it was me next day id be in studio, but all in all I think Kenyans haven’t understood the whole concept of beef, a beef is just a way of showing that one person is on top of his game than the other without personalizing issues”.

 

And I agree with Kayvo K-Force, the animosity should be used to fuel creativity. And that is exactly what the fans want to see and hear, Khaligraph has released his Ether. Octo shouldn’t back out. Kibera is demanding to be represented. And I for one feel that this beef might give us more interesting tracks than “Tuendele ama Tusiendele?”

You know that’s what you want too, it’s not just Uncle Chim Tuna and Kibera demanding this beef top produce hit songs!

If we are to look at celebs’ past, then Octopizzo is the real guy that started from the very bottom. Born in a mud house in the heart of Kibera – Matopeni – Henry Ochieng’s life was a struggle more of survival than living.

He says, “Pamperz zi ju buda ange afford ju hana any, na nappy si mpya ni zenye mother ali inherit frm next of kin.” But now he’s relishing his achievements as he’s raking in “zeros”. This, he revealed as he uploaded an old family photo with his late dad at the center.

Meet Octo’s dad;

 

 

Now we know where he gets his looks from.

Willy M. Tuva is one of the most popular celebrities in the land, the sort of faith his listeners have placed in him is overwhelming. Luckily, even when people do something that we would otherwise consider bizarre, he has the patience to weather the storm with a smile. And he is more often than not able to pull a rabbit out of a hat and give them exactly what they need.

 A fisherman all the way from Naivasha got off his boat and on a bus to Nairobi in search of the man he felt would be able to help him accomplish his dream -record a song. And not just any song, the lad has lofty, if not aggrandized ambitions, he wants to record a song with either Jose Chameleone from Uganda or Diamond Platnumz from Tanzania -the biggest stars in East Africa at the moment.

And while I would balk at such a request, Mzazi took it in stride and has decided to see what he can do to help actualize this dream.

 

 

 

 

When you are a star, style is crucial lest you are confused for a commoner. The thing with style is that sometimes is that you have to cough up a pretty penny and Ogopa Deejay’s Colonel Mustapha is wiling to do it.

The rapper posted a photo of his Givenchy Star-Strap High Top Sneakers that cost approximately 685 dollars that is approximately 60,000 shillings…for SHOES!

These shoes have been worn by the likes of Diddy,Ace Hood and Swizz beats

Photos:celebnmusic247.com

 

We have all seen the irritating Facebook picture that purpots to illustrate how women flourish once they get married while men suffer aye? If you haven’t, please burn your phone and/or computer and proceed to book a one way ticket for yourself to Moyale and proceed to trudge towards towering acacia trees as you make a start in your new life as a hermit!

The picture was hilarious the first time it was shared but is now boring. As dull as Baba Ghafla’s sense of humour. Anyway, this is the picture of which I speak:

 

 

 

Well, just how true is it that women flourish after they get married? To find out whether this picture holds any truth, I decided to look at Kenyan celebrities. Let us check out the before and after pictures:

 

SIZE 8:

 

Before:

 

After:

 

Verdict: She was ratchet before marriage. She seems to have mellowed down. She actually even seems happier -more wifey, less bang-la-dash!

 

Lulu Hassan

 

 

Before:

 

Admittedly, the two were dating but still, she was legally single.

 

After:

 

Verdict: She lost the ratchet, gained weight and is actually glowing. And you know what they say about a man whose wife is glowing aye? No? that’s why you’re single even as Valentines day ius coming up! Nothing makes a man look better than a wife who is happy

 

Wahu

 

Before:

Those shoes are simply horrible -Wahu’s that is.

 

After:

 

 

 

 

Verdict: She is healthier, happier and alot less ratchet. Infact, she is downright classy!

 

Kambua

 

Before:

 

 

 

 

After:

 

 

 

 

 

 

Verdict: Admittedly, she has always been hot but, she was more Nairobi girl hot. Now she that lady allure. You just now that if you met her in an alternate universe ofcourse (Uncle Chim Tuna doesn’t condone cheating), you would have to get your grown man vibe flowing.

 

Emmy Kosgei

 

Before:

 

 

 

Yup, that’s actually her!

 

After:

 

 

 

 

Verdict: Put went the plain Jane from down the lane now that she is married, she seems more relaxed. More comfortable in her skin and in who she is if you will.

 

The moment I realized women flourish once they get hitched I was like:

 

 

AND THE MEN’S LIST WILL BE UP SHORTLY!

 

 

After a long hiatus, the Ghafla! look-alike section is back. So let’s see if this engine will start and stay running once again. That said, let’s find celebs’ twins and let’s unite the world one face at a time!

We’ve just discovered that former Arsenal talisman and French striker, Thierry Henry, for New York Red Bulls in Major League Soccer has a ringer in Kenya! Titi King Henry and Q FM’s Rashid Abdalla seem like twins separated at birth.

These two great personalities bear some spooky similarities that at first look you can’t tell who is who.

Check out these unrelated celebrity twins (as far as we know);

 

 

 

 

Last Monday, the country’s most highly regarded record label left jaws dropped after it took a ‘suicidal’ move that ended blossoming careers of recognized artists in the country. While the affected artists are still grappling with the bitter pill in their mouths, Ogopa Deejays is once again making headlines for the wrong reasons.

Earlier yesterday the crisis at the South B based record label deepened after the meeting that was meant to artists’ fate was aborted at the 11^th hour putting their careers and unreleased projects in a limbo.

According to our inside source at Ogopa, producers at Ogopa opted to first meet with the top management alleging that last week’s decision by the top tier management was “irrational”. At some point during the meeting tempers flared and blows were almost thrown as a lot of words of where the sun doesn’t shine were exchanged between one famous producer and the CEO, Lucas Bikedo.

 

We are made to understand that the meeting became a shouting contest after the producers learnt that Lucas, after freezing everyone else’s music opted to release, amid protests, a song by vocalist and afro-pop/soul singer, Viola Karuri.

Anto, the head producer, lamented that it was very wrong for Lucas to go ahead and release the song before resolving the impasse citing bias. He complained that a lot of time and effort was put into recording projects for the ex-signed artists just to be dropped at the last minute and without prior notice.

Our source further intimates that an infuriated Anto subsequently gave an ultimatum that he alongside his junior producers will quit if 5 days if the matter is not resolved. This, he said as he burst out of the meeting banging the door behind him much to the shock of the hapless top dogs present who watched defenselessly.

Once again, we reached out to Lucas for his side of the story on these very scathing allegations but just like Monday, his phone was completely off and even the numerous texts sent to him went unanswered for 12 hours 45 minutes now. For now we are still waiting for Lucas’ response.

Viola

All the same we spoke to Viola, whose track featuring will be released tomorrow for her comment on this whole drama. Defending herself, the gorgeous singer said;

“See, the upside of being signed to your own A&R Company (RedLily Entertainment), is that my team and I decide what music to record, who to record with and when to release it. I am, therefore, not subject to Ogopa’s inside politics and do not require anyone’s ‘permission’ to release my music!” decalred Viola.

She added, “As far as being given top priority at Ogopa, I pay top $$$ to work with the best… Lucas, in my opinion, is the best at what he does and has a track record running over 12 years…”

And bragged, “…so why shouldn’t I get top preference?”

Is it the end of Ogopa’s era? Keep it here to find out more about this as we also keep you posted immediately Viola’s ‘controversial’ track drops.

 

 Somebody should call the waambulance for the artistes suffering from a severe case of whine flu.

 For the ones that  have become the Moaning Myrtles of the world.Moaning Myrtle is a ghost in popular Fiction book Harry potter who was a constant gripe fest and would cry at the slightest whim. Some musicians have the habit of whining when things don’t work their way, when their music does not get played for being PG 21when DJs don’t play their songs on radio because they are substandard.

While we will sympathize with you for a while we will get tired because well you are fighting for the rights of a shallow song with three lines and a lot of booty shaking. That time you use whining and taking shots at the musical bigwigs, blaming the Kenya Film Commission and appealing to the president to get your song played could have been used to create a song that is actually playable. They are other people in your position who are also talented and maybe their music doesn’t get played but instead of whining they are working their ass off to get to the top. Take for example Psy of Gangnam style. It said that Psy was a failed musician and the authorities had even banned a song of his for being”obscene” and controversial with the claim that his songs would “negatively influence children”

You would think that after a decade of failure and being demoted for not taking his work seriously, Psy would whine A LOT and give up, but he didn’t .His time to shine finally came in 2012 when he released Gangnam Style that became an instant internet sensation. Even Ban Ki-Moon got to jam to it.

 Look at PSY looking all cool and sh*t showing the UN Sec General how to ‘werk’ it

So what am I saying, getting to the top is not easy, whining will NOT help you, you will just look like a cry baby and no one will take you seriously even if you are talented. So stop whining, get to the studio and make something good.

To conclude this article,a word from the wise Randy Pausch

“If you took one-tenth the energy you put into complaining and applied it to solving the problem, you’d be surprised by how well things can work out… Complaining does not work as a strategy. We all have finite time and energy. Any time we spend whining is unlikely to help us achieve our goals. And it won’t make us happier.”

 

 

Sassy singer Size 8 has always been tight-lipped about her marriage to celebrity deejay, DJ Mo. However, last Friday, the Mateke hit-maker finally revealed the secrets of her matrimonial home on live TV as she guest-anchored KTN’s news.

Well, as men, we’ve all been there. The relationsh*ts where the girl you’re dating brings more drama than happiness to your life. For DJ Mo, though, he found a good woman; a woman that makes him better.

 

Looking at her she easily passes off as a diva who doesn’t touch anything in the house lest she spoils her well and expensively manicured nails. Opening up to KTN’s sultry anchor, Betty Kyalo on Friday Briefing, Size 8 shocked many when she revealed that she performs most of the house chores describing herself as “the traditional woman”.

“There’s no more sleeping and eating fries, you have to cook…cooking that ugali, even my nails…acha tu nizifiche; from washing the sufuria and stuff,” opens Size 8.

And for those who imagined that Size 8 has hired a house-help who runs the ‘kitchen affairs’, she reveals, “Am a traditional kind of woman. I don’t believe that my husband should be cooked for by someone else…me napika io ugali, naosha vyombo…asubuhi kama ako supposed kwenda somewhere early ata kama ni 6 o’clock, I wake up and cook!”

She adds, “Me, I used to sleep till 11 and when you feel like eating, tu-chipo apo, pizza and whatever you order but now it’s cooking!”

Speaking about her hubby, Mo, Size 8 says, “He loves eating, he loves good food, so I have to cook.”

The Gospel singer also divulges that her husband has a very good heart something that some people have taken advantage of but he will never do anything to hurt someone. “He’ll never! He has a beautiful heart.”

 

Hate her or love her, Huddah is attention-grabbing and she has got Africa’s attention by the balls. People want their daily fix of Huddah.

Who she is dating; who she is banging or who she is fighting with is a subject of interest and discussion.

She has established herself as the queen of controversy, but controversy aside, what kind of men is Huddah into? The pretty boys or the Rob Evans of the world ?

Rob Evans

Well this comes as a surprise but Huddah has got no love for the good-looking men.She posted this photo of Mavado whose caption read:

“Mavadogully my kind of man , money. Respect, the darker the berry. The sweeter the juice LOL! I don’t like them PRETTY NIGGAS, good looking niggas! Unless yo Wizkid Ayo Balogun LOL!”

For celebrities, philanthropy offers a chance to give back to society by opening their hearts and wallets. One such celeb is Jaguar. During the making of his latest hit, “Kioo”, Jaguar came down to the level of the inmates at the Industrial Area Remand Prison and even shared a meal with them as he featured some of them in the video.

For two of the inmates, that was the beginning of the end of their life behind bars. Earlier this week, Jaguar flanked by Tanzanian rap guru, AY, played a vital role in the release of the two prisoners and they are now free men.

Here he is with the two;

 

 

It’s still not clear how Jaguar managed to convince the Prison authorities to set free the two inmates but it will be remembered that in December he helped another 5 petty offenders out of jail after he cleared their bail bonds at the same correctional facility.

Meanwhile, Jaguar’s “Kioo” is the most viral video this year on YouTube with over 221,000 views in exactly one month! Take a look;

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Good morning fam! Say hello to ‘little Friday’, stay strong the weekend is just around the corner. Here’s something that will sure keep you rolling;

#1 Kenyans On Twitter (KOT) Brutally Attack Teacher Wanjiku’s New Show

#2 Chris Brown Embosses Kenyan Flag to His Clothing Line. Take a Look at Him Rocking a Hoodie with the Flag

#3 Citizen TV’s Lulu Hassan and Her Husband On Their Wedding Day (Photo)

#4 Miley Cyrus Says “I Want To Go To Kenya”

#5 Larry Madowo ‘Sings’ Love Song for Caroline Mutoko

#6 Prezzo Snubs Huddah, Makes Up with His Tanzanian Gal

#7 I Am Not A Lesbian: Nini Wacera Says

#8 Why You Will No Longer Be Watching Your Favourite Weekend Gospel Show on NTV

#9 The First Tujuane Episode To Air On NTV Ends In Disaster! Check out this video

#10 Just How Magnetic is Prezzo? Capital FM’s Sassy Cess Mutungi Admits Missing Prezzo

Jimmy Gait has recently released the video for his latest song, “Makekes” and the blogs have been awash with a quote of 2.5 million for the whole video.

While that seems like a figure that would bode well with the flashy personalities of show business, Jimmy Gait does not want to go that route. “For a secular musician, flossing is OK, but for me as a gospel artiste, that would look like I’m being proud, which is a sin.” He claims not to know where the 2.5million figure came from, though he still insists that he put a lot of effort into the project nevertheless.

 

 

 

“I went to South Africa to shoot the video with the top producer in Africa who shoots all the commercials for DSTV. I wanted to achieve the glamorous look of many of the top videos right now, so I made sure we went to a South African studio, even though some of my partners thought it was too much.”

Jimmy Gait does not want people to focus on the money aspect of the video, but he wants them to see how he is trying to push Kenyan entertainment to the next level. “Kenyan videos are OK for now, but if we don’t push for a world class standard of videos, then we will not reach the global level that Nigerians and South Africans have managed to attain,” he told me in a brief interview. For those who are curious about “Makekes,” here is the video itself:

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