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Smirnoff Fiesta: Taking The Beach Party To Bobs

Where are my party people at? The weekend is here and although it has started off sloppy what with the weather, trust that Uncle Chim Tuna has something amazing for you and yours. Well, technically., if you’re in Mombasa, I have something awesome for you.

And it comes in the form of Smirnoff Fiesta! For those of you who have never attended a Smirnoff party, please allow me to tell you that it transcends partying. But maybe you need to gain the experience for yourselves.

And I recommend you do. Why?

This time round, Smirnoff is bringing the beach right to your favourite haunt. That means that you will get to enjoy beautiful women in beach wear, handsome lads in shorts and party!
 Leave your problems in the parkinglot and come prepared to “hanye”.

 

And just where will this party be? Bob’s in Mombasa. So get your beach gear going and come through the party to end all parties!

But remember to drink responsibly.

Did You Know That This Kenyan Filmmaker Has Shared The Same Platform With Bill Gates?

 

Kenyan film maker Wanuri Kahiu recently made Kenya proud for being the first Kenyan in a Ted-X event.

She spoke about her film Pumzi, her experience as a film maker and how she feels about  labels. You can watch it here

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Ted X is a program that aims at gathering the public together in a forum to enjoy what the organization calls a “TED-like experience”

Here the world’s top intellectuals and go-getters get to speak for 18 minutes and share their world changing ideas. Someof the speakers at this forum include Microsoft’s Bill Gates, Former US Vice President Al Gore, Virgin Atlantic’s and UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown

 

These Lucky Women Were Eric Omondi’s Valentine ‘Date’ (Photo)

 

Valentine’s Day is one of the most celebrated holiday’s in the world,and for a good reason it’s the one day we put aside all of our differences and show some love.

Not only love for your spouse your family, your friends but it’s also a day that you show love to the less fortunate. The ones that do not feel as loved and do not feel like they are worthy of love. Comedian Eric Omondi gave women at the Shimo La Tewa prison a valentine present by visiting them in prison

The comedian posted the picture below with the following message:

“Best valentine ever…at Shimo la Tewa women’s prison…hawa wote ni ma valentine wangu. Beautiful people.”

 

Valentine’s Day Lessons From Bootylicious Video Vixen Maura Malanga

Valentine’s Day is finally upon us. Today is also the day that most men will use up the little cash they had saved to join the boys to slake their thirst for their favourite poison, so there goes the plot of hooking up with the boys. This is also the day that lasses be expecting ‘manna’ and lads, you know how that goes.

On Valentine’s Day is the day those messages of ‘I care for you’ and ‘I love you’ with a magnanimous dose of pampering and a generous layer of affection is simply not enough for some women.

Realizing how mean and self-centered some chics can be, bodacious video vixen and plus size model, Maura Malanga has a word for this women.

She opines;

“Dear Ladies, appreciate whatever your man gives you today even if it’s just a Ksh.10 lollipop as long as he does it with love. Remember there are those who are used and dumped but your man gives u all he has no matter how little. Buy him a gift too. Happy valentine’s day beautiful people.”

Amen to that!

Introducing Twende Kazi Na Tusker! The Newest, Hottest Kenyan Reality Show

 

 

Last year, Kenyan’s celebrated a huge milestone in this young nation’s history. Kenya turned 50. And the good folk  at Tusker in collaboration with some of your biggest celebrities want to do it big! From Collo to Bebe Cool to Jalang’o and Allan Wanga. And with these A-listers, you know it will be all that hype and more!

 
Do you remember the old Tusker ad about “Baada ya kazi, burudika na Tusker”? Well, Tusker has decided to rekindle that spirit -in a manner of speaking. While it’s true that alot has changed since then, the best elements of both Tusker and Kenya have been retained.
One of the elements that was retained by both is the hardworking nature. Kenyans are reknown the world over for being hardworking and Tusker will seek to celebrate that as they embark on a new exciting chapter:

And just what is all the hullabaloo about I hear you ask, well, lads and lasses, Tusker is launching a brand new show, “Twende Kazi” and when you think about it, I want you to think about having to travel across the breadth of Africa, to get to London! Tusker hapana tambua small so magnify your understanding of the scale!

 

Add excitement, add countries and couple it with the best of the Kenyan spirit and you have an amazing new show. The premise? Ordinary Kenyans join the hottest (Eve d’Souza hot!) East African celebrities as they make their way through Africa to get a bottle of Tusker, Kenya’s finest brew to one of Kenya’s most illustrious sports sons, Humphrey Khayange.

You will get to see the best of Kenyan ingenuity, innovation and spirit as Kenyans make their way to Britain without getting on a plane. I am talking bushwacking, bundu bashing, begging for rides on donkeys and boats. Kind of like what you have to do when you go upcountry -except ofcourse if you’re from Machakos County!

 

Ghafla! POLL: Which is the Hotter Show? Churchill Show or Churchill Raw?

 

Churchill’s comedy show is undoubtedly the biggest in the country in its own right. Even though the show has been rocked by considerable walkouts it still stands as the TV comedy show to beat in the country.

Last night, the live recording and the 51st episode of the show took place at the Carnivore. The beauty about attending the live recording is that you get to watch both Churchill Show & Churchill Raw at the same time while the rest of the country waits for Sunday and Thursday respectively.

So last night marked the end of Season 3 of Churchill Show. The comedy show is taking a break after 51 exhilarating episodes.

With that we ask, which show did/do you prefer? Churchill Show or Churchill Raw?

{acepolls 120}

 

Meet Abel Mutua’s (Freddy-Tahidi High) Fiance and Cute Daughter (Photo)

A while back, I had written an article about how Citizen’s Tahidi High program is the ultimate star maker. The fictional school has recorded the highest number of success stories in the country so far.

Some of the success stories include Sarah Hassan, Ferdinand Omondi, Dennis Mugo a.ka.a Oj and Abel Mutua who played Freddy

In a heartfelt letter to his late mother a while back, Abel Mutua a.k.a Freddy revealed that he had a kid with an a lady whom he referred to as supuu wa karatina. I contacted the actor who shared with me his wife to be supuu wa karatina whose real name is Judy and his beautiful super adorable daughter Stephanie

Stephanie as a baby

Stephanie now with her mummy

Judy a.k.a Supuu wa Karatina

Aww!How cute is She?

Has Prezzo’s Tanzanian Ex Already Moved On? Is This Her New Man? (PHOTO)

Their love affair was public and sadly, so was the fall-out. Everything about their affair was public: from declarations of love to spiteful messages.  My colleague Sue Watiri picked up on all that noise and hullabaloo.

And after it was all over, Chagga Barbie for that is what the lass calls herself, announced to all and sundry that she had erred and asked Prezzo for forgiveness. Talk about a twist in the plot!
Then Huddah came out declaring to all and sundry that Prezzo is the best lover she has ever experienced and that was before all the hullabaloo with Colonel Moustapha.

For now, though, allow me to share a picture that Chagga Barbie shared:

 

 

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Is this Prezzo’s replacement? Well, yes and no. He is a Valentine’s Day replacement of sorts. For the photo shoot. But upon further investigation we realized that this is actually her bestfriend’s boyfriend.

 

The caption that followed this picture was:

chaggabarbie@munaabdirahman don’t kill me for posing with ur boo #ValentineLoveMustBShared@decutee88 mchuchuwako kaniua mbavu na hiii eti my sista Happy Valentine unakumbuka nikikiwaza ukiwa down Leo hii sijawa wa kwanza kutakiwa #HappyFakeLoveDay nimecheka mpaka basi my kaka katisha

Don’t Be Left Out On This Amazing Networking Opportunity

Bangaiza; an online social networking service.

 

Users must register before using the site, after which they may create a personal profile, add other users as friends, exchange messages, and receive automatic notifications when they update their profile. All you have to do is visit www.bernsoft.com/bangaiza

Additionally, users may join common-interest user groups, organized by workplace, school or college, or other characteristics, and categorize their friends into lists such as “People From Work” or “Close Friends”.  

Entry is absolutely free!

Another Big Collabo on the Way between Prezzo & This Flamboyant Artist (PHOTOS)

Doing collabos is good for artist’s music career.More often than not most collabos come out way better than the original songs. We’ve already seen the ‘Dumbala Remix’, the biggest collabo this year but now yet another collabo is in the offing.

Earlier in the week, Ogopa’s Supasta Baby One posted a photo of himself with Prezzo and only said, “expect big tings dis year no jokes…” and in another photo, “big tune comin soon”, all indications that these two are about to hit the studio together.

Check out;

 

 

Baby One seems to have set his eyes on his music career this year considering he’s fresh from dropping a new video;

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Make Your Dream Wedding A Reality! Largest EA Wedding Fair Happening In Two Weeks In Nairobi. Don’t Miss Out!

Dreaming of that perfect wedding but you just don’t know where to start?

The Samantha Bridal wedding fair is the only place to start! The EA longest running and most

trusted bridal show starts on Feb27th- March 2nd.

 

Like is the norm, the Samantha Bridal Wedding Expo will convene under one roof the

crème de crème of the wedding industry and the distinguished upcoming names and

brands promising to take wedding romance and indulgence into a whole new level.

From designers and stockists, cakes and caterers, hotel and honeymoon, invites and

floral to travel and transport, closing your diary for the four-day event is just what

your wedding checklist will need to make peace with you!

 

No matter what happens, make sure to book yourself on the front rows for the

fashion shows every 1300hrs to 1400hrs and 1700hrs to 1800hrs! Look out too for

the incredible prizes on raffles, keep an eye on www.samanthasbridal.co.ke to see

what competitions the individual exhibitors will be running and don’t forget to book

your seat at the bridal workshop. Note that timely booking is essential as the space is

limited.

 

Shove off Classic 105! Citizen Radio & Radio Jambo are Still the Radio Stations to Beat

 

I hear most people argue that Classic 105 is the biggest radio station in the country but according to the latest report, Classic is the 10th most listened to radio stations in Kenya. Not that I have anything against the most popular radio station in Nairobi but numbers simply don’t lie.

According to the KARF report released this week for the last quarter of 2013 (Q4), Citizen Radio is neck and shoulder above all the radio stations in Kenya and is followed at a distant second by Radio Jambo then Q FM.

Citizen Radio boasts of over 12.5 million listeners weekly alone while Radio Jambo gets 7.2 million listeners. Meanwhile, Q FM’s weekly reach stands at 6.1 million listeners.

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Citizen is still the radio station to beat with 60% market share while Jambo and Q FM are at 43% and 29% respectively.

The top stations in the country are;

#1 Citizen Radio

#2 Radio Jambo

#3 Q FM

#4 Radio Taifa

#5 Milele FM

#6 Kameme FM

#7 Inooro FM

#8 Radio Maisha

#9 Ramogi FM

#10 Classic FM

 

Banned: After Wolf Of Wall Street,The Kenya Film Classification Board Outlaws A Number Of Films

 

After Wolf of Wall Street The Kenya Film commission has outlawed a number of films.

These are films that are related to the late Sheikh Aboud Rogo contentious Muslim cleric .Anyone found with these movies might spend sometime in the can.

Speaking during a crackdown on forbidden and unclassified movies in Mwembe Tayari Mombasa, KFCB head Bonventure Kioko said that the films were too intense and could encourage religious violence. He added that “These movies have become a key avenue for radicals to spread their teachings. Be warned that we will not allow them to be sold,” said Kioko

Board slaps ban on Rogo films to curb youth radicalisation

KFCB with some of the banned films (Photo Ndegwa Gathungu)

This moves comes after police raided Masjid Musa mosque in Mombasa after they were informed that Muslim youth were being trained by some Al-Shabaab Al-Qaeda sympathizers

Source: The People

 

Taking it Too Far? Kenyan Rapper Releases Track Dubbed ‘Bonga Mavi’ Featuring Birdman’s Cash Money Records Rapper

Have you ever listened a track that was so explicit you prayed right after hearing it? If you haven’t, you will very soon

One of Kenya’s legendary rappers and entreprenuers, K-Nel, is just about to release song entitled “Bonga Mavi” – the remix- off his forthcoming mixtape, and we must say, I must say I was stunned! Featuring Glasses Malone, an American rapper, the song is expected to drop tomorrow (Feb 15th).

Most rap songs with explicit words are featured in underground cyphers, but for K-Nel, he wants the whole world to know about #BongaMavi.

 

 

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K-Nel had previously dropped the track but after meeting Glasses Malone they decided to put their heads together.

 

Glasses Malone signed with Cash Money Records in 2011 turning down offers from many labels like Def Jam Records, Interscope Records, J Records and Atlantic Records. He was found by the same record executive that found The Game. Along with his signing, he was also given his own imprint, Blu Division.

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Glasses Malone

Let’s wait for this jam, gross as its name may sound.

A Case Of Mistaken Identities In The Latest Drama In Town

DECEPTION Hilarious Comedy at Alliance Francaise: Thur 27 Feb at 6 & 8pm, Fri 28 Feb at 6 & 8pm, Sat 1 Mar at 3, 6 & 8pm, Sun 2 Mar at 3, 6 & 8pm.

Powerful Senator has carefully planned a romantic weekend getaway telling her ever busy gynecologist husband she’d be away on official business.

But he gets suspicious and follows her! An eager masseuse, a stressed police officer and a safe sex agent join in. A series of mistaken identities ensue. Madly hilarious show!

Prepare for crazy fun! Starring Mary Wangari Gioche, Mwaura N Bilal, Nariki Janet Kirina, Mourad Sadat, Martin ” Daddie Marto” Githinji and Mwikali Maryi. Directed by Mbeki Mwalimu and produced by Abuto Eliud. Stage management by Mwajuma Belle. Front office: Larry, Cynthia Njuguna, Rynoh Reagan Kukuni, Masuti Mwalimu, Peter and Nimrod Lucky Mwangangi. Lights and Sound by Allan Bryan Weku.

Tickets @500/=. Special offer: You can now purchase your advance ticket at only 400 bob via Mpesa 0726524124. Offer runs till Thursday 20th February. For bookings, Call/Mpesa-0726524124/0728130134, Airtel: 0734524124 or call 0202025811. Email: info@fcakenya.co.ke. Treat yourself to a thrilling evening of high quality entertainment.

Tusker Project Fame Finalist Amileena Introduces Her Prince Charming (Video)

Yesterday we announced that one of Tusker Project Fame’s greatest success stories Amileena Mwenesi was dropping another hit on Valentine’s Day.

Well, Valentine’s Day is here and the ‘Shine’ singer has dropped Mawazo. In Mawazo she speaks about her Prince Charming saying that “He treats me so special, in his eyes I’m royal. I am in paradise. He gives me good loving not ever wanting. He is My Prince charming”

The video is shot in the beautiful coast by Team Mistari. Check out the video here

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Amileena had this message for her fans:

” Be it love for a spouse, or love for a child; Love friend, or a complete stranger…Or ultimately, love for and from our creator; Only LOVE can build us a bridge of life…So let’s not wait on ONE day to live it, love it and learn to share and enjoy in it…Love hard today and everyday”


Lupita Named Among 99 Most Desirable Women on Earth. She Even Beat Kim Kardashian & Kate Middleton!

 

Sexy women are everywhere. However the most attractive ones are usually considered the active ones. So it didn’t come as a surprise when the Internet’s premiere site for gentlemen, AskMen.com named Kenyan actress, Lupita Nyong’o one of the most desirable women in 2014.

AskMen.com’s annual list of 99 Most Desirable Women plenty of some of the favourite actresses, singers and even a CEO who are not only sexy but smart too.

 

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Our very own Lupita is ranked at #22 ahead of some of the biggest names in Hollywood like Miley Cyrus, Kate Winslet, Katy Perry, Selena Gomez, Kim Kardashian, Zoe Saldana, Sandra Bullock, Kate Middleton and Taylor Swift.

 

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AskMen.com defended themselves why they ranked the silver screen goddess #22;

“Her film debut may have been just this past year in 12 Years a Slave, but she’s no amateur — if her degree from the Yale School of Drama and her appearances on the awards circuit are any indication (she’s nominated for the Best Supporting Actress Oscar). This gorgeous actress is poised for a major takeover.”

Find the rest of the list HERE.

 

The Weekend For The Mingle Wth Jaguar

Its finally here! Nax Mingle season 2. The grandest party in the best place to party brought to you by the largest radio station in Rift valley and bringing you the biggest star in local music now, Jaguar.

Nax mingle is going down this Saturday in Kenya’s party capital, Nakuru. This time round the event is bigger and better.

A total of 5 DJs will bring down the roof ….the 1st DJ on stage will be DJ Willy with MC Festus there after two DJs & two MCs will take over…DJ Spyx & DJ CJ …hype men MC Branu & MC Emos will bring down the roof just before Jaguar takes the stage….

The last pair of DJs will be DJ lean alongside DJ Sam who is the only DJ in Kenya who performs in a costume. The duo is expected to take Nax Vegas on a musical journey.

Other activities include play stations competition, modeling, shots competition, surprise appearance from top comedians in Kenya and pastor digital.

Record Label Spends Valentine’s Day with HIV+ Orphans

Valentine’s Day is here and love is in the air. All you see is red when you walk on the streets of Nairobi. This festival of romantic love is being celebrated by wining and dining at some of the finest joints around the City.

However, for Candy n Candy Records, this Valentine’s Day, it’s not just about romantic love. Rather, they are sharing love with less destitute children in the sprawling slums of Kibera whose parents died of HIV/AIDS.

 

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Candy n Candy Records is vending valentine merchandise on the streets with the proceedings going to charity.

The label’s CEO, Joe Kariuki stated that it was a worthy idea to have something special for those who may not be able to enjoy the glamour that comes with the lovey-dovey day.

Joe & Baby Madaha

“Valentine is not just about individuals and buying gifts. While the same is important, as Candy, we felt that we could do something small for humanity and we will be selling merchandise which will include a DvD, a valentine card and flowers with the proceedings going to charitable work,” declared Joe.

This afternoon Candy n Candy will be at Angels of Hope Kibera to spend Valentine’s Day with the little angels.

Check Out These Hilarious Photos Of Churchill Raw Comedian As A Child (Photo)

He is a familiar face on the Churchill Show and you have probably listened to him on Royal Media’s Hot 96 where he is a presenter.

Just like other Churchill show comedians he has managed to carve a niche for himself, he is the guy that cracks the Meru-inclined jokes just like Owago Onyiro’s jokes are more Luo-inclined .

Anyway have you ever wondered how the rib cracking, tear jerking comedian looked as a child? How he looked way before the money, fame and lucrative deals checked in? Well wonder no more. Here are  pictures of the comedian and his pals ‘Back in the day’. Can you spot him?

 

Hungry? Delicious Food Is A Click Away…

 

Get a free bottle of La Terre Red French Rine for the first six orders above 3000

Anghiti Restaurant (Indian cuisine)

Anghiti restaurant have travelled the length and breadth of the Indian continent to produce

food that does justice to regional dishes and ingredients. Inspired by the streets of old delhi

they have dishes such as dum biryanis,kebabs and a range of delicious curries are highlights of the menu

http://yum.co.ke/order/menu/nairobi/anghiti-westlands

Urban Spoon

If you are looking for African cuisine and continental cuisine all in one Urban spoon is worth a

visit, its a cafe serving trendy kenyan/african meals with a blend of modern healthy and trendy dishes such as sandwiches, salads.

http://yum.co.ke/order/menu/nairobi/urban-spoon

 

Crazy Valentine’s Package! Check This Out

 

Small Heaven bakery is driven by passion. it is based at home and each cake is specially made for you. They do cakes for birthdays, engagements, graduations anniversaries, parties etc
 
This Valentine’s, Small Heaven has offers that come in packages.
 

For 2,500/= you can get;

  • Red roses
  • Swiss Chocolates
  • Brownie Cookies
  • Cards
  • Teddy Bear Key Chains

 

For 4,500/= you can get;

  • Red roses
  • Swiss Chocolate
  • Cards
  • Chocolate cake
  • Bottle of Wine

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Fee for delivery out of CBD @300

 

 

EXCLUSIVE: Another World Renowned Celebrity DJ Coming to Kenya

In August last year, Kenyan house lovers were treated to a thrilling performance from Edward Maya who brought his A-game as the music kept everyone on their feet the entire night until the wee hours of morning. And now, yet another world acclaimed deejay/producer is headed to the 254.

Thanks to Monster Radio, Kenyan fans will finally quench their thirst as DJ@War makes his way to Nairobi. Speaking to Monster Radio CEO, DJ Mobi, he confirms that the celebrity deejay is indeed on his way but didn’t give the exact date only revealing that it will be in the first quarter of the year.

 

 

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DJ Mobi

Hailing from the USA, DJ@War has been making a name for himself on the international stage. As a DJ his resume reaches far and wide in over 25 countries- whether performing to over 10,000 in Nairobi, headlining for Pacha in Malta, dropping the bass at Elune in South Korea, or at his bi-monthly residency at the world famous Space in Egypt.

As a producer his tracks have attracted support from genre pioneers and current stars alike- Eric Morillo, David Guetta, Tommy Trash, Fedde Le Grande and many more. In 2012 he featured as a producer on the Jaguar Skills & Amazing Friends album on Ministry of Sound, which propelled him to #2 on the ITunes UK Dance Chart. His tracks have been featured on labels like Toolroom, Downright, and Peak Hour.

DJ@War at a past concert

Featuring numerous times on BBC Radio One’s “In New DJ’s We Trust,” he’s been called upon for private parties for celebrites and brands to include Rihanna, Jay-Z, Smirnoff, Moet, Switzerland, and Adidas.

The Singles Get Celebrated Here

The Singles Party is happening on Saturday and you have to be there.

It will be the biggest party so far for this year and will be on an enclosed area of the Greenspan Mall parking lot, with an expansive “village” featuring varied cuisines and 12 different food outlets, 3 bars and lounges Nyama choma, 4 different Djs.

On board is Dj Adrian of Capital FM Charges are Kshs. 300 advance and Kshs. 500 at the gate

DJ Wesley Dumps One FM

Celebrity deejay, Wesley Yegon, better known as DJ Wesley is the latest to leave One FM. Wes left earlier in the week for Standard Group as a consultant.

Wes, who has a rich experience in music shows, now takes over as a consultant at KTN’s Baseline music show. His broad appreciation and knowledge of many musical styles and genres, as well as his understanding of music after years of deejaying, provide a solid foundation for producing or consulting on just about any project.

 

 

Asked how much the deal cost to lure him from One FM, the talented ‘spinsmaster’ laughed it off and remained tight-lipped about it. He only said, “Hio ni yangu na hao wasee…”

However, our sources say it is a lucrative contract that will see him stay at Standard Group for ‘a long time’.

His exit comes just two weeks after the urban music station suffered another major blow following the departure of one of its top news anchors, Leah Mutimba.

Ghafla! wishes him Godspeed.

A Twist For Your Valentine’s Weekend

Lex tours, give you this very opportunity of a scenery made specifically for the lovebirds. check out their package and itinerary.

A one night camping experience at Paradise Lost on 15thy Feb.Charges are only 8,000/= per couple and Non-citizens pay USD100. From this very little fee, you get to experience the night of your life! Transport shall be provided, mattress + blanket & park entry. Your meals shall be catered for.

This camp is NOT for couples only, singles also can join. You never know… As a single person, you pay 4,000/=.

Lex tours will not provide drinks, insurance or personal items. You are expected to meet at Kenya Cinema tomorrow at 3pm.

Campers will leave Paradise Lost on Sunday at around 4pm

Payment options are as follows;

M-Pesa to 0725591122- Nazmin Sumra.

Cash payable to NAZMIN A SUMRA

The management is not reliable for any payments made to any other individual.

FULL PAYMENT is required by 14th February 2014 (today).


A Mountain Lodge With Untold Secrets Now Open For You

Enjoy your getaway with your loved ones this valentine season in a perfect setting away from the noise of the city.

Lobelians Tours, have a great solution for you this weekend with a trip to a lodge on a mountain.

From 15th to 16th you can enjoy the exclusiveness and serenity of Bantu Mountain Lodge which is tucked in the woods on the lower slopes of Mount Kenya.

Make the Bantu Mountain Lodge you home for just 6,500/- per person.

This covers your transportation to and from Nairobi, your diner and breakfast, Accommodation tents two people sharing, camping fees, bedding and a sleeping bag.

For more information you can get to Agnes Mueni +254718703679 or Jane Mambo +254721986249

Why Kenyan Music is Nothing Compared to that from Nigeria, South Africa, Uganda & Tanzania

Back in the 60s up until early 90s Kenya was the yardstick of Africa music. As an African artist if you didn’t record or release your single/album in Nairobi then would have started counting losses. It’s not a wonder why the likes of the late Tabu Ley, Mbilia Bel, Koffi, the late Franco, Defao (who I hear lives in Dandora, but that’s story for another day) and other accomplished African artists sang about Kenya or mentioned Kenya in their songs. Kenya ndo ilikua kusema (as our social media guru, Chege, puts it).

Fast-forward to the new millennium. Kenya’s glory in the music scene is fast dwindling and less and lesser artists are making their way here. Kenyan music videos are no longer getting airplay on Africa’s biggest music channel, Channel O (tell me of any 5 Kenyan music video you’ve recently seen playing on Channel O and I’ll buy you a crate of quail eggs).

 

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Just like that we’ve witnessed Nigeria rise from just an oil-rich company into an African powerhouse for music and movies; and nothing is stopping them. Just like Kwaito is now a mainstay in our clubs and deejays’ mixtapes. Just like we are now aping the bongo-style of singing (Gospel notwithstanding).

But really what’s ailing this once very lucrative industry? Here’s what I think is;

1. Lack of unity

Which genre can we brag about as our identity in music? South Africans have kwaito, Tanzanians have bongo. But here…! every record label is emerging with its own style to outdo the other. Instead of concentrating on producing quality music they compete on who has the latest genre/sub-genre!

Meanwhile as we are mark-timing our African counterparts are reaching new horizons. You can’t compare even in your dreams Kenyan music to Naija’s, Bongo or Kwaito. Never!

Instead of artists working together to see the prosperity of this industry, they’re busy tearing each other down.

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There are cartels fully in operation that ensure certain artist(s) makes it/ doesn’t make it in the industry. And if you thought it was a joke think again. These cartels pay some of the top radio hosts not to play music from certain record labels or artists. Yes, it’s deep-rooted like that.

These cartels are anchored so deep that they even exist in the Gospel scene. Kwanza I’m made to understand that it’s worse there before if you don’t belong to a certain faction your hopes of making it as a Gospel singer are as good as dashed.

This disunity has killed a lot of artists’ careers who wanted to be neutral and just do music roho safi.

2. Piracy

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I don’t know why I didn’t enumerate it as the first point. All the same, we’re here.

Part of the reason why music industries in Tanzania and Uganda have made great strides is because piracy has totally been wiped out.

And it begins with you and I even before the government swings into action. Let’s appreciate artists’ effort because they like us are also looking to put ugali on their tables and so if you buy a pirated copy of an album you’re denying that artist their right to earn from their sweat and instead given that vendor something that doesn’t belong to them.

The government thro’ MCSK, PRSK and other music bodies are playing their role perfectly in trying to mitigate this vice, and all props to them, but their actions alone won’t go a long way without you.

Appreciate Kenyan, buy Kenyan and but genuine.

4. Greed

This has played the lead role in deterioration of standards. Most Kenyan artists are so freaking greedy and that is killing their careers.

You see an artiste sign a million-shilling contract with a leading corporate and then voila! life changes. Lad starts living la vida loca forgetting what tomorrow holds.And if you ask them they tell you;

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6 months down the line he/she is dead broke!

This is the point that panic mode checks in, so does desperation. Artist with all reputation they’ve build for years starts performing at 20Gs gigs and just few months back if you (as a promoter) didn’t have few hundred thousands shillings you couldn’t afford him.

And once promoters/event organizers hear that you did a 20K gig, my friend that’s the beginning of the end for you because these guys compare notes. It’s then that all the offers you get don’t surpass the 20k mark and if it does, it’s with a few thousands, but NOT more than 30k, if you can negotiate above that come tell me.

The desperation now even drives you to perform your ‘ka-local’ joint before a crowd of 50 guys. When you’re here my friend, forget about leaving the country on invitation to perform, start quail farming.

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Lesson: set your standards and stick by them. Greed will kill your career.

5. Lack of professionalism

Comparing Kenyan artists to their Nigerian counterparts in terms of artist organization is like comparing the performance of a Vitz to that of Rolls Royce.

There’s very little professionalism in the industry. Artists run their career jua kali way throwing caution to the wind. Music and acting is like any other white collar job and if you don’t take it seriously no fan will.

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Look at guys like Davido, D’Banj, DJ Cleo, Mi Casa to name a few; they’ve got their house in order when it comes to communication and organization.

No, it’s not too late to make amends. We can still reclaim our glory as Africa’s music powerhouse.

Lilian Muli Gets An Exclusive With Lupita Nyong’o

Why is this important? Because all the other TV stations couldn’t think of this and even if they did, Lilian Muli beat them to the punch like she always does. Also because I happen to think Lupita is sexy and i am looking forward to watching the interview.

but please allow me to start again and do a proper introduction.

Lilian Muli is one of Kenya’s best news anchors and interviewers. She follows a story to the end -and she is good at sussing out leads and trends. That is why it should come as no surprise that the enterprising lass went all the way to a cold, dreary, frozen tundra that Americans call New York to look for Kenya’s golden girl: Lupita Nyong’o.

The quest wasn’t easy seeing as Lupita has a busy schedule but she stuck it out and managed to land an exclusive interview. Keep it Ghafla for more information on when it will air and all that.

 

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This Is A Must See: Radical Photo Journalist Exposes The Kenyan Diaper Mentality

 

When it comes to being a voice for the voiceless, Boniface Mwangi is THE voice for the voiceless .The photo journalist and protestor gave Kenyans a shocking wake up call when he posted a few photos on twitter with the tag “The Diaper Mentality”

Before I share the shocking and hilarious photos, let us first find out what is the Diaper Mentality.

“As Kenyans our problems, big and small, are considered teething problems that we shall overcome in the fullness of time, when the nation achieves the required maturity before the problems go away, virtually on their own. We call this the Diaper Mentality.”(Source the Diaper Mentality.com)

Here are some examples of the diaper Mentality:

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The guys who pee in public places

 

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Visiting Witchdoctors

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Men who batter their wives

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The slum tourist

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The Ngara Market Trader(Ladies we can totally relate to this situation)

Photos.www.diapermentality.com

You can check out the rest of the photos here

 

 

Chocolate And Wine For Free In A Florida Valentine Package

Florida group has your best desires covered this Friday,  come and experience the ultimate valentines party at the one place parties are done as they should be done.

With a line up of intimate treats both musically and dating outing. F2, F1, Attitude Restaurant and Queen Sheba restaurant combine efforts to lay done an unforgettable party kicking off at noon till morning with a diner treat for couples capped up with a night of partying in a day filled with romantic indulgence from Chocolates, cookies and wine plus special cocktail to let the guards fall off. Mark your calendar.

They will lay a 3 course Diner for 2 at only Ksh.1200/=
Prizes will be given for the best dressed Lady, Gent and couple.
Free Chocolate with all Chocolate flavored cocktails and shots.
Free cookies and wine for the first 100 love birds.
10% Discounts on all wine bottles purchase.
Chocolate Vodka and Tequila at special reduced rates.  

Single & Sexy? This Is Where You Should Party Tonight

If you are single on this lovers day, don’t fret. Here is a party catered to you. The Singles Mingles Party takes place at the Viva Lounge in Kileleshwa from 8pm.

Entertainment will be provided by top of the mix DJs and there will be a number of giveaways and complimentary appetizers. Do not let your night be bland and normal, come and mingle.

Entry is only 1,500/-

Lupita Cooks And Gets The World Going Crazy About Kenyan Cuisine

I have always been  of the opinion that Kenyan food is bland. I wouldn’t expect anyone who has only traveled from Nairobi to Nyeri and Mombasa to understand what I mean. Only those who aren’t “local” can relate.

I am however beginning to reconsider my opinion about Kenyan food. Nope. that would be a lie. Uncle Chim Tuna makes no apologies. Then again, I have found that when village girls cook, their is a marked difference from the bland froth Nairobi girls think is food.

Away from that. i recently came across a blog that was set up in appreciation of food from all over the world and I found a nice piece it had done about Lupita and Kenyan cuisine.

It also brought back memories of a Lupita Nyong’o interview I watched where she was teaching the host about Sukuma Wiki a.k.a Kale. Anyway, check out the introductory part of what the blog had to say below:

 

“To hear her Lupita’s first  name some may recognize it’s Spanish origin and that her last name Nyongo denotes her African heritage.  Currently, the12 Years a Slave star is one of Hollywood’s “It girls.”  Nyong’o was born in Mexico City, Mexico where her family were political refugees.  It is traditional to name a child after the events of the day, so her parents decided to give her a Mexican first name. She is the second of six children.”

 

Click this link to read the rest of what they had to say.

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Colonel Mustapha: “I Am In Love With Huddah”

 

Yesterday, a picture surfaced online of socialite Huddah Monroe and Colonel Mustapha in a compromising position.

This led to speculation that the two were the item. I don’t believe in hearsay so I had to get to the heart of the matter and find out was really cooking in between them.And this comment by Mustapha on Instagram peaked my curiosity Colonelmustafa With my BOSS LADY @huddahrepublic I got the hottest chick in the game

 

I called up Mustapha to get to the heart of the matter. This is what he said “I am in love with Huddah but we are friends “He then added that “I do not understand why Prezzo treated her badly, yeye ni mtoto mzuri sana”

Huddah on her part was very coy and not eager to spill what was happening in between them .This was her response to Mustapha’s declaration of love “I have nothing to say about this issue .I don’t think I will ever have anything to say about this issue”

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-EJ_ZdjUtVYc/T-mqJMSJEDI/AAAAAAAAAEI/T7GkaQXPRjI/s1600/okay-meme-face.jpg

 

 

Sexy, Hot, Wet & Wild! Here Is Where You Spice Up Your Love Tonight

Liddos is a famous club known for its Adult entertainment.

Today, do away with your usual routine of valentines and let love go wild. The best part, you can enjoy even if you are single. Liddos

Nairobi’s Archive of adult entertainment presents to you the wildest Valentine show with a 100% satisfaction guarantee. Liddos club is located at Keerok Road off fire station.

The best dressed couple will get a free bottle of wine.

Collo’s Bonding With his Daughter -Who Is Now All Grown Up (PHOTO)

Collo has been around for more than a minute and is one of the few musicians Kenya has produced of the current generation who has proven that they have lasting power. No one hit wonder tings. And he has seen it all and done it all so really, it should come as no surprise that he settled down and sank roots.

And from that, he begat a daughter -listen to me sounding like I pulled that straight out of the Old Testament.

Anyway, Collo begat a daughter and trust that it was Ghafla that let you know. Away from that, let us get down to why we’re here today and that is for the cute picture of Collo bonding with his daughter and teaching her all about the “art” of selfies. Check that out below:

 

 

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P-Unit Release New Video For The Track Love. Watch It Here

P-Unit decided today would be the best day to release the video to their hit song “Love” and honestly, I can’t even blame them. Sound marketing strategy seeing as today is the day set aside by the world to celebrate consumerism in the name of love.

But I shan’t wreck it for anyone and before you even ask, no, Uncle CVhim Tuna doesn’t claim Team Forever Alone.
But away from all that, P-Unit has always been versatile. And when they made this track, I dare say that they were out to prove that exact point. The track was produced by Musyoka and has a distinct South African feel to it.

The video was shot in S.A and has them crooning to beautiful ladies who play love interests and what I like is that they aren’t afraid to get out of their comfort zones and for a change, they actually sung. The video quality is crisp but we have come to expect quality from P-Unit so it comes as no surprise that this musical offering is simply quality. Check it out below:

 

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A Tale Of Love In Hurlingham’s Paradise

Tonight, six designers,exhibitors and music performances will highlight Kenya’s Premier Valentine event at Hurligham.

This is its second edition proudly sponsored by Snapp.  The
show will run from 7- 11pm featuring a showcase by six designers,
exhibitors & music performances.

Collections to be showcased will introduce a fuse of the 1950’s all
the way to the 90’s from Marilyn Monroe to Aaliyah Haughton, inspiring
an African twist of Fashion.

Come and experience this great tale of love as you travel down the memory lane with great classical entertainment.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hisia Of TPF 6 Releases Melodious Love Song. Check It Out Here

Hisia was a ladies favourite in the last cycle of TPF 6. And it makes sense that he releases something for the ladies. A song about how his love interest played him like a clarinet and left him heart broken. Aah yes, the kind of song that was meant for this Valentine’s period.

The lad opens up on a stripped down track that is essentially just acoustic although some more instruments are introduced later on in the song. I think this approach is brilliant because it allowed him to play showcase his vocal array and impress even the harshest vocal critic -me.

The lyrical content is also superb as he decided not to take the pop route on his first release and went for something melodious and soulful. But if I keep yammering, I might wear your ear down so please allow me to introduce the track “Mawazo”:

 

 

14th February 2014: Ten Things You Should Know This Morning

Today is February the 14th or as my woman calls it, Valentine’s Day. Aaaah yes, today is the day women find out whether they are in a relationship or if they are side chicks or just straight out DTFs. And what a sad day it will be for many a man tomorrow after they recount the financial holocausts their girlfriends meted out on their bank accounts. But as Lil Wayne said (never thought I’d EVER quote anything he has to say) “If love is in the air, I put on a gas mask!”

But away from all that. Let us get into the top ten stories making the biggest splashes in the entertainment scene:

 

 

#1. Me.

I beat Jeff. Only Jeff bests me and even then for the briefest of spells but not today. Today I break his streak and embark on let me shut the uh… Here the number one story is:

Mzazi Willy M. Tuva Held At Gunpoint (PHOTO)

#2. Me again!

Avril’s Boyfriend Proposes And She Says Yes (PHOTOS)

#3. Me again!

Huddah Moves On After Prezzo To Another Celebrity. And We Have A Picture Of Him Fondling Her (PHOTO EVIDENCE)

#4. Jeff came in where I let him.

 EXCLUSIVE: More Top K24 Journalists Fired!

#5. Mbusii Opens Up About Why He Is No Longer On Churchill Show: “There Was Always An Issue With Pay”

#6. Has Larry Madowo Ditched His Valentine Date Caroline Mutoko For Mumbai?

#7. Even Before The Money Checked In,KTN’s Mwanaisha Chidzuga Was Still A Hottie (Photo)

#8. Top Trending Images in Nairobi This Morning

#9. Kenya’s First Openly Gay Drag Queen Takes Shots At The Fake Gays

#10.Photo: Lupita hangs Out with CNN’s Piers Morgan

Experience The Nairobi Party Scene As You Have Never Experienced It Before

Ladies and gentlemen, beautiful people, party animals, Uncle Chim Tuna has some exciting news for you. And what I have to say I guarantee you will revolutionize the way you party. Trust me when I say that you have never partied like this.

And on that not, allow me to take a step back and ask, “Just what does partying in Nairobi mean?”
Think about that question carefully. Just what does partying in Nairobi mean? And here I am talking about the places known to throw a good party.

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From Westlands to Ngong Road, to Thika Road To Waiyaki Way. Whatever it is, things are about to get better. The ladies are about to get more beautiful, the lads, more handsome, the party alot more epic.
And Smirnoff guarantees it!


Tonight, Smirnoff unveils a revolution in the party scene -and trust that the revolution will be televised.