Month: February 2016

Award winning spin master and CEO OF Spin Cycle DJ Kaytrixx is contemplating joining politics come the next general elections.

Having reached quiet dizzying heights in the Kenya showbiz industry from just a trainee in one of the then biggest DJ units Code Red to an award winning DJ and owner of his own unit and among the biggest such outfits locally he sure needs a new challenge.

However, he is yet to decide on the position and right now he is engaged in just mobilizing residents in the area to turn out and get registered in the ongoing voter registration exercise.  He has however made known the area he would be looking at which will be Mikindani in Changamwe.

For now, the Deejay whose real names are Kabochi Gakau says he is enjoying his deejaying career while still raising money for any future political move. Here is the poster by Kaytrixx that has been doing rounds online

The Churchill Show juggernaut has been in existence for a pretty decade now. That’s a very long time for a show to still be stuck in the past,stuck in a creative rut and stuck in a hole. Which is,sadly,what the comedy powerhouse seems to be going through; an inability to surge forward,break new ground,reinvent itself and offer progressive comedy and performances.

We would excuse The Churchill Show blunders back in the early,formative years when the whole team was just assembling,trying out a virgin laughter industry and attempting to introduce themselves to the market. But it’s 2016! And Churchill Show,the premier humor trendsetter,cannot be excused to carry on the disastrous comedy of errors they’re increasingly becoming notorious for.

Watching Churchill Show last night,a pompous event recorded in front of a giant,ebullient audience in Mombasa,among whom sat the Mombasa Governor himself Hassan Joho and other reputable names,I cringed and gasped at the absolute lack of creativity exemplified by these so-called Comics who tottered onto the stage,uproarious,only to screw up 30 seconds into their act,lame joke after another.

First came Lucky Balaa,a comedian who started his journey of comedy on the Top Comic show that once aired on NTV back in 2009. Balaa,a Coast-based comedian who,having been in the business for close to a decade,should know better. Or act better. But he was sadly a disaster after another. All of his jokes were shamelessly derived from Facebook and WhatsApp. The ‘Alahamdulilahi’ joke he started with had been doing rounds on WhatsApp for weeks. The other joke about some guy farting after bending over to view gold rings was a stale,Facebook joke that expired around November 2015. But Lucky Balaa wasn’t so lucky at originality. He came onto stage with the same regurgitated trash we’d seen and forwarded to each other across social media. And thought we’d never notice.

Obviously,the Mombasa audience would laugh itself lame. And for an audience so famous for lethargy,I didn’t expect them to NOT laugh.

Next on was Butita,one of Churchill Show’s lifeline. But Butita,his Nairobi popularity notwithstanding,was another mess. His act was a sorry,lame joke. He painfully struggled through a routine that was plain,humorless and bland. His whole act was a struggle at lack of punchlines and tact. Despite being a Churchill Show staple for over three years,Butita’s banal act in Mombasa was something you wished never made it on TV. Or another town. And yet,it was.

Njoro was next up. When you see Njoro,you’ve pretty much seen his whole act. Before he speaks,you know what’s up. You know what you’re about to be served with – a dish of cold,stale Kiambu Jokes. Throughout his unmemorable tenure at the Churchill Academy,Njoro has refused to grow and reinvent himself,overhaul his act and venture deeper to a much wider spectrum and creative arena. He has,for years,relied on those predictable ‘Kiambu’ versus the rest of Kenya jokes and doesn’t look like he’s about to let the stale act go. In Mombasa,he stuck to himself. Kiambu this,Kiambu that. Mombasa this,Kiambu that. Same old petty lines. Nothing new. Just stuff you can cook up too with your chang’aa-selling Auntie.

Resident Mombasa comedian Maji Moto came too. And said stuff I forgot the minute he stepped off the stage,amid a hail of applause.

And that’s just what I saw last night. Such comedic blunders are really what personifies the Churchill Show. Starting from the Show’s President,Churchill,to the subjects,there seems to be a serious lack of creativity and tact in this vaunted humor power plant. They’re not funny anymore. Not that they were ever funny anyway.

I am privy to the mechanisms of the Churchill Show. And I do have firsthand information on how this team works,who runs things here,the rehearsal process,fountain of jokes,etc.

Every Tuesday,some chaps who work for the Laugh Industry,which is Churchill’s entertainment company,converge at The Carnivore where they meet prospective comics who’ve traveled from around the Country for auditions. These comics,jobless young men and women with a desire to be noticed,launch comedy careers and hopefully appear on TV,are required to come along with their own jokes. And after fumbling through their act,the amateur audition is over and some guys are told, ‘Kujeni kesho rehearsal’. Others who weren’t so funny,or didn’t bring along outstanding material are sent back home,some as far as Nakuru,and asked to show up next Tuesday for another such rehearsal.

The process to enter the Churchill Academy and finally end up on TV,or with some little pay,is an arduous,grueling task that is as excruciating as it is unrewarding.

The top guys at the Churchill Academy insit that YOU have to craft your own jokes and perform them-something that greatly contributes to the garbage that ends up on TV. Passing as comedy.

It should be known that NOT everyone who can write a joke can perform it. Creating a joke is a totally different process from telling it on stage. Alot of people who can craft a masterpiece of a joke are probably too shy,awkward or unconfident to tell the same joke on stage in front of a massive crowd.

The Churchill Show management seems to NOT understand that there is a whole different arm of WRITING JOKES. And another for telling the jokes.

What kills the Churchill Show comics,most of them young anxious men who are still in college or have little income is the insistence from the authorities that THEY show up with their own jokes.

Creating something funny needs a relaxed,open and calm mind…. Something these kids we see on TV don’t have.

When they are not on TV, they’re out here running around,trying to combine classes and hassling,worrying about family,girlfriends,the sudden trappings of fame,their future,longevity and a whole lot of other things. These boys barely have time to be relaxed,they can barely have time to be creative. What with the crazy,struggling boy schedules they have.

And that is why,after a long week of worry and struggle and pettiness, these boys show up with rubbish on stage. Because they were REQUIRED to bring along their own Joe’s.

Also,there is something called ‘Burning Out’ which is something creatives do a lot. They burn out. 98% of the comics on the Churchill Show burned out in 2014. All they are doing now is struggling through a routine just to afford rent and to afford food.

The Laugh Industry,a huge entertainment company owned by Churchill,should start investing in COMEDY WRITERS. AND a

serious,competent crew of creative people not the sort of clueless,drunk bastards who have routinely been hired to ‘audition’ comedians every Tuesday at Carnivore.

Churchill himself,more than anyone else,needs a COMEDY SCRIPT and a team of writers as soon as yesterday. Neither him nor his platitudinous cast of boys seem to be adept at creativity anymore. Maybe they can tell a joke. But they can’t write it. Or create it.

Big Television Comedy shows fronted by legendary comics,the likes of Jon Stewart,Jay Leno,David Letterman,Stephen Colbert,Conan O’Brien and Jimmy Fallon DO have a special creative team that specifically writes the jokes that end up being told by these seasoned television comedy stars.

The likes of James Corden,Trevor Noah,Andy Cohen,Bill Maher and others DO NOT create their own jokes. They just tell them.

We need to move from asking our not-so-creative performers to create their own jokes. Churchill needs to,as a matter of urgency,recruit a background team of funny experts who write jokes and then pass them off to Butita, Njoro,YY,Mc Jessy,Karis,Sleepy etc.

Maybe these kids can perform the jokes on stage. But surely, they CANNOT write them.

And knowing Churchill,and how much millions he makes off this brand and show,he can surely afford to hire a fresh robust team of comedy writers… Butita and his ilk can no longer be trusted with what’s funny and what’s not.

Sure,he can tell the joke on stage. But he can’t create it. They’ve,for years now,proved so.

The show needs quick salvation. But to be honest,with the sort of sickening cronyism that has consistently plagued our entertainment industry,you can be assured that the chaps who will be hired to write jokes are dumb blokes who either schooled with Mc Jessy or struggled through Kenya National Theater with him. Not fresh,virgin talents.

Disastrous.

Alaine Laughton found love when she flew to Kenya in September 2014 and her life has never been the same again!

Alaine came to Kenya in September 2014 for a performance only to discover ‘Wafula’. The Jamaican went back to her country only to return to the 254 some two months later to search for ‘Wafula’.

Also Read: Alaine Returns To Look For Her Sweet Wafula, But Before That, This Is What She Did To Larry Madowo Live On Camera

Well, Alaine ‘snubbed’ Kenya in 2015 but the songbird has since returned ‘home’ this year. Alaine touched down at JKIA last Friday and was picked up by Churchill.

The two then flew to Western Kenya for the shooting of their collaboration ‘Wafula’. Alaine featured Churchill in ‘Wafula’ a song that started off as a ‘joke’ on Churchill Show.

The two, Alaine and Churchill’ were in Kakamega for the shooting of ‘Wafula’. See photos below:

President Uhuru Kenyatta is still wagging on people’s tongues following his punctuality in congratulating Uganda’s de facto leader.

On Saturday at exactly 9:43 at night, President Uhuru took to social media to officially congratulate Yoweri Museveni over his ‘win’:

“I am very pleased to congratulate His Excellency President Yoweri Museveni on his re-election as President of the Republic of Uganda. The people of Uganda have spoken, and they have spoken very clearly. We respect their choice of President Museveni.

Kenya values its close friendship with Uganda. That friendship is founded on a common history, a common culture, and common interests. In years past, we have worked closely together for the prosperity and freedom of our nations. We look forward to continuing the work that both our nations have already done, together and in concert with the East African Community, the African Union, and IGAD. We look forward, too, to even closer integration.

I wish President Museveni every success as he serves his nation for another term. He and Uganda can count on my support, and my friendship, as well as that of their brothers and sisters in Kenya.” Wrote Uhuru.

Uhuru’s congratulatory message has not only rubbed most Kenyans the wrong way but has also been a subject of scrutiny.

Kenyans have criticized the President for rushing to congratulate the Ugandan leader when the election was marred by lots of irregularities.

Social media blackout, Kizza Besigye’s unwarranted detentions, clamp down of opposition supporters, claims of pre-ticked ballot papers etc are some of the reasons why most world leaders have been hesitant to congratulate Museveni.

That explains why Kenyans were bitter with President Uhuru after he rushed to give Sebo a thumps up following the hotly disputed elections.

“It took you Mr Kenyatta 6days to congratulate Magufuli of tz but it has taken you hours to congratulate a dictator.. He won by 60% funny no celebrations in Uganda , what does that speak?” One bitter Kenyan, Bettern Chero Kibet, was quick to remind Uhuru.

Morning beautiful people?? Uganda has a new president and everybody is still talking about his victory in the just concluded polls. President Museveni triumphed over his main opponent Kizza Bisigye in a hotly disputed elections. The incumbent will now rule the landlocked country for 5 more years probably even vying again in the next presidential poll. Museveni aside, below are the trendy stories on our site this Monday morning:

#1This Is Why Churchill Was Arrested After His Show In Mombasa (Photo)

#2Etemesi’s Tales | Fornicating In The Office

#3Prezzo’s Ex Causes a Stir after She Shares a Photo of Her and Her Sexy Lover Frolicking in Bed

#4The Co-Wife To K24’s Mwanaisha Chidzuga Dumps Her Ex Minister Hubby Danson Mungatana

#5Gospel Singer Willy Paul Goes To A Popular Nightclub To Watch Vera Sidika Shake Her Big Buttocks (Photo)

#6How Ratchet Are Comedians Becoming? Sleepy David Hot and STEAMY Photos With A Lady Leaked After Failing To Pay The Photographer (Photos&Screenshots)

#7Nigerian Tycoon Showers Vera Sidika’s Buttocks With Numerous 100 US Dollar Bills At A Strip Club (Video)

#8‘I am Behind Her A 100%’ Avril’s Fiancé Trashes Break Up Rumors with This Act

#9Pesa Ya Kanisa: Flamboyant Preacher Splashes 41 Million Kshs on a Lamborghini Aventador for His Yellow-Yellow Wife (Photo)

#10Ghafla! Exclusive: Ex Vitimbi Actress Nyasuguta Exposed For Conning Young And Vulnerable Girls (Evidence)

Vanso Da Gama whose real name is Evans Kelvin Nyongesa is an accountant by profession. The 25 year old is a Kenyan rapper and a song writer from the leading label Pacho Entertainment.

The rapper says back then he was unable to live of music only, he had to look for side jobs in order to fit in the ever- demanding Kenyan society. It is this past experience that led him to do Juu ya Doh hit, to send a clear

message that he is doing this for money. His music journey stems from his high school days where he used to write lyrics and remix other artists’ work. It is however after he met Rapdamu Naiboi, C.E.O Pacho Entertainment, in 2010 that he realized music tops his list of priorities.

Ever since he has done singles like Ghipuka, Party Time and Big Bang Theory. He took a break in 2013 to concentrate in his accounting studies and he hopes his new hit Juu ya Doh will pick from where he stopped in 2013. Juu ya Doh which means “about the money” is a song based on the daily hustle encountered in daily life of a Kenyan citizen.

It is an invitation extended to Kenyans to take music seriously, because just like any other ordinary job, it contributes positively to the Kenyan economy. This message is beautifull packaged in a melodious feel -good rhythm that is not only insightful but also pleasing to the ear. Here is the video

 

Nairobi Senator has declared the number of women he has. Hon. Mike Sonko made the rather bold step of declaring his women after he was quizzed by a follower on social media.

All this was prompted after the Senator who has a penchant for posing rather cheeky posts at times posted the video of a man busted in another man’s wife home with the wife. The caption the senator used to accompany the post asked whether it was right to bring ‘our’ mpango wa kandos to the marital home.

It was this comment which prompted one of the observers to ask whether he, Sonko had any mpango wa kandos. The senator promptly replied stating that he had only two wives who lived separately and who he duly respected. Here is the nice exchange.

 

Gospel most flashy celebrity with a seemingly bottomless pocket is in South Africa completing the last section of his video shoot.

Keeping to his typical nature, the shoot was done in a grand scale, with all the expensive sites, amazing sports car, of course a troupe of dancers and on point fashion accessories. This time round he was joined by a fellow youngster and popular artist from Nigeria, Koredo Bello. The video is expected to be out soon acting as an affirmation to Nairobi Records commitment to shoot a videos at most in two weeks.

Here are the photos from the SA shooting

 

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A lady online has been busted for impersonating Kenya’s most storied socialite Vera Sidika.

The lady one Elizabeth Mathenge who is quite a groupie with local celebrities pulled quite a sensational move to one local deejay charging him for company and other services. According to the deejay based in Mombasa and popularly known as Deejay Charlie he got a text from the lady on Whatsapp and they started chatting.

She proceeded to try and prove her Vera Sidika persona by sending photos and even said she had a manager. The DJ was supposed to send cash to her manager in order to arrange for their meeting. However, the man hesitated even with constant pressure from Elizabeth and when the lady blundered and sent the man a friend request, his instincts of curiosity led to him investigating.

The lady had made the error of using her Facebook prof pic on her Whatsapp prof pic despite having considerable small booty vis a vis Vera’s. To find out her name, Charlie sent her 10 via the number given and her identity was revealed.

Even then the lady tried to pose as the real Vera acting as concerned that someone had been impersonating her until when iot was obvious her goose had been cooked. Here is the rather interesting conversation between the two and photos for the bonoko Vera Sidika.

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Calvin Kirimba popularly known as Calvo Mistari escaped unhurt after a physical confrontation with armed robbers.

Calvo Mistari was attending a house party in Madaraka Estate,Langata, when armed thugs stormed the house he was in.

The two-man gang tied the occupants as they went on a mission of rummaging through valuables that they could carry.

Calvo Mistari managed to set himself free as the thieves were busy gathering whatever they could carry with them.

The daring singer wrestled one of the thugs and managed to snatch him his gun. The thug took to his heels after he was overpowered prompting his colleague to dash out of the house as well.

The incident happened on Thursday night. Police are still looking for the thugs who are still at large.

Credit: Daily Nation

Is there anything that the flamboyant Mike Sonko can’t do?? The lawmaker has repeatedly downgraded the meaning of a ‘honorable member of parliament.’

Baba Saumu has pitched camp in Malindi campaigning for Jubilee Alliance Party Malindi Constituency aspirant, Phillip Charo.

Also Read: Kwani How Many Multimillion Shillings Houses Does Sonko Own? Check Out His Beach House Mansion In Malindi

Sonko is doing EVERYTHING to get Malindi electorates to vote for the JAP candidate. From campaigning door to door to joining locals at drinking dens for a sip of traditional brew.

Sonko was caught quaffing mnazi with Malindi residents as he tried convincing them to turn up in their numbers and vote for his candidate during March 7^th by-elections.

Watch the video below:

Vera Sidika’s gigantic booty is such a valuable asset for her, the socialite is minting serious guap possessing yummy butt that millionaires can’t resist!

Queen Vee was at a strip club where she made extra dollars just because a Nigerian tycoon couldn’t take his eyes off her buttocks.

The socialite was rocking a tight dress that brought out her physical features in a way that could prompt Catholic clergy to break their celibacy vows.

The socialite took to the stage after a stripper enchanted revelers with a steamy pole dance that aroused mild sexual excitement.

Vera was followed to the stage by men who made it rain on her. But a Nigerian tycoon in specific ‘carried the day’ when he showered Vera with $ 100 bills.

The socialite quickly grabbed the money making sure no one looted them as they fell on the floor. Watch the video below:

 

After receiving numerous complains about Eunice Wamboi alias Nyasuguta, Ghafla! sought to find the truth about her alleged damning scam.

Nyasuguta runs an eponymous agency ‘Nyasuguta Global’ which takes Kenyans to the Middle East for blue-collar jobs.

Ghafla! received an email from Rose (we won’t reveal her second name) who was grumbling about how the former Vitimbi actress had conned her.

Her email read:

“I have a problem and I have been trying all means but all in vain, this lady Eunice Wamboi aka nyasuguta Vitimbi had an agent office for taking girls to the middle East, she took ma documents, pasport and good conduct,she told me to work in her office as a secretary, i worked for two months she paid me nothing,later she asked me to give her 7,000to get me a driving licence yet I don’t know how to drive, she promised to take me to a driving school which she did not, later she told me I will go to dubai as a family driver and i will be taught how to drive there, i failed to understand how I can go as a driver yet I don’t know how to drive,I was staying at her home place in Santons kasarani,I got tired of waiting so I quited, I have been trying to ask her my documents and my suitcase it’s now 8 months, I am a single mother from a humble background,also the first born, my question is i owe her nothing why is she holding my documents, does she have a human heart really??when I call her she don’t answer my calls, she sends me texts insulting me,even if I get a job they need a certificate of good conduct and she has it.All I beg for is for my documents I have suffered enough. HOPE SHE HEAR MY CRY.THANK YOU”

We grilled Rose to get to the bottom of the allegations and then decided to reach Nyasugata for her comment on the same.

Apparently Nyasuguta has been receiving money from Kenyans in the guise of taking them to the Middle East only for her to disappear.

Our efforts to reach Nyasuguta so far haven’t yielded anything. Her phone number 0720871*** hasn’t been going through and her office on Moi Avenue, 6^th floor Summit House, room number 601, has remained closed for the days that we have been looking for her.

Rose says she has reported the matter to Central Police Station. She explained Nyasuguta was the one who called her from her village with the promise of finding her a job in the Middle East.

The lady is crying foul saying Nyasuguta took all her documents and she has since gone underground. This was before the former Vitimbi actress threatened her with a lawsuit.

Several complains from other Kenyans have also been lodged against the actress after Rose took to social media to narrate her ordeal.

 

Daniel ‘Churchill’ Ndambuki aka Mwalimu King’ang’I found himself on the wrong side of the law after his show in Mombasa.

Churchill and his brigade of comedians invaded the Coastal City of Mombasa about a week ago to inject a dose of laughter to residents in the 001.

The event was crammed by Mombasa residents who were eager to be entertained by some of the dopest humorists in the 254.

After making Coasterians laugh their lungs out, Churchill was completely shaken after a cop approached and cuffed him.

The comedian put up frantic fight as he tried to argue his innocence repeatedly asking the cop why he was arresting him.

Just when Churchill thought his fate was sealed, to be the guest of the state that night, the comedy king was let loose.

It was all a prank which was pulled by his buddies and celebrity cop, Man Dilly, who is a singer. Just like Larry Madowo who almost peed on himself following a prank at Villa Rosa Kempinski a fortnight ago, Churchill too was shivering like an Arctic polar bear after he was cuffed.

They were not officially married but Cecilia Mwangi and a married Danson Mungatana was an item, they even sired a daughter out of their love!

Former Miss World Kenya Cecilia Mwangi, started dating former Garsen MP Danson Mungatana knowing all too well the former assistant minister was married to ex KTN turned K24 anchor Mwanaisha Chidzuga.

Their half a decade relationship has since crumbled and the former beauty queen no longer talks to her baby daddy.

In an interview with the Star Newspaper, Cecilia revealed she ended her relationship with the former MP over a year ago.

Even though the anti-jigger ambassador says they mutually agreed to end their romantic affair, the two no longer talk to each other, there is ZERO communications between them!

Things are so bad between the former lovers that they no longer even share responsibilities for their four year old daughter.

“We don’t even share responsibilities for my daughter. I am a hard-working and responsible lady, capable of taking care of her needs to the fullest.” Cecilia told the Star.

So why did Cecilia and Danson Mungata break up? Unnamed source say Mwanaisha Chidzuga’s prayers worked miracles.

Mwanaisha Chidzuga

Danson Mungatana

Credit: The Star

It can never be said that Nick Mutuma does not know how to pick them. After dating the beautiful Bridget Shighadi for a while, Nick picked yet another pretty Biracial Chic named Tanasha Donna Barbieri Oketch.

20 Year Old Tanasha is a model who moved back to Kenya recently after spending sometime in Europe to pursue her modeling career in the motherland. Luckily, her modeling career is off to a good start as she has been featured on True Love and even starred as a Video Vixen in AliKiba & Christian Bella’s  Nagharamia.

Tantalizing Tanasha recently shared some steamy Bikini photos that had men everywhere wishing that Tanasha was their beau.

 

 

 

 

 

The country is yet to get over Prezzo’s unforgettable interview on KTN, the interview where he flirted outrageously with the beautiful Betty Kyallo and ‘rukad’ his girlfriend live on air.

But if you thought that Prezzo’s interview was outrageous, then you should wait for what the ‘raverend’ of the Kenyan showbiz is bringing to our screens. In a tweet sent out to Betty Kyallo Shaffie wrote:

Tonite I get to finish what my Brother @AMB_Prezzo didn’t finish as I hang out with @bettyokari on #FridayBriefing @KTNKenya #TheRaverend

But this time Betty is prepared and told Shaffie this “I’m ready. Bring it on. #FridayBriefing”

To tune it to this highly-anticipated episode, hook up with Betty Kyallo Tonight at 9 on KTN

The 2016 Grammy Awards happened on February 15th… With spectacular performances from some of the music world’s most popular figures. Lady Gaga brought the house down in a stupendous performance in tribute to the iconic David Bowie,Taylor Swift,the princess of music and perennial Kanye West target of hate opened the show in a shimmering number blitzing her way through her number one hits,Tori Kelly had the perfect ‘Resting Bitch Face’ of all time,Kendrick Lamar shook the arena with a politically-charged performance that stirred up America and Adele,the god of music,fumbled through a performance that was replete with sound troubles,technical hitches and her strange inability to weave through her notes and work those pipes as flawlessly as she’s known to.

Lauryn Hill and Rihanna,both music divas notoriously known to stubbornly make their own rules and do as they please,bailed out on their scheduled performances almost throwing the whole event in limbo for a minute.

Many Wards were dished out that night with Kendrick Lamar,the new rap czar,taking home five gongs and Taylor Swift,exuberant and ebullient,taking swipes at her omniscient detractor, Kanye West,putting him down and managing to inspire little girls and young artists all at the same time.

Demure British singer Ed Sheeran took home the Hong for Song of The Year for his ubiquitous love anthem ‘Thinking Out Loud’,Meghan Taylor,my personal favorite,was honored with a’ Best New Artist’ gong,Bruno Mars,the electrifying Super Bowl legend walked away with the ‘Record of the Year’ honors for ‘Uptown Funk’,while the’ Best Dance Recording’ Grammy went to reformed teen derelict Justin Bieber for ‘Where Are U Now’.

Other awards were presented for different categories and Taylor Swift took home the Award for’ Best Video ‘,Kendrick walking away with yet another for anti-police rallying anthem’ Alright ‘,Reggae band Morgan Heritage scooping the’ Best Reggae Album ‘ and seasoned Gospel luminary Kirk Franklin sweeping away the’ Best Gospel Performance ‘gong.

Inspired by the Grammy Awards,and the glorious performances that illuminated the night,Ghafla Kenya has decided to line up our own AWARDS too. Uncreatively titled’ Kenya’s Grammy Awards 2016′.

And HERE are the winners. As voted by…. Us!

1. Best New Artist- Timmy Dat

He brought you the Pacho-produced hip pop hit ‘Welle Welle’ with a special,comical flow peppered with some distinctive Luo accent and with some very witty punchlines and catchy hook and melody. Even after ‘Welle Welle’, Timmy Dat continued to surprise us with hit after hit,funny space styles and some very interesting,unique videos. His current hit ‘Tumekubali’ with the Kansoul is currently ruling the airwaves and one of the most played songs in Kenyan clubs countrywide. He has an captivating style of rap that,for it’s easiness and catchiness, has endeared him to the masses and earned him many collaborations with established rappers including P-Unit’s Frasha, Rabbit and Nonini. Timmy Dat contains to rock us and surprise us with stuff we didn’t see coming… Like the fact that he wears flowing blue Legio Maria robes for a school scene in the ‘Tumekubali’ hit. Genius.

 

2. Song of the Year – Mwema, Mercy Masika

For the second time now,Ghafla has crowned Masika’s Mwema as the song of the Year. And rightfully so. Despite the fact that the song was released late December 2014,it,to this day, still drives audiences crazy and is also one of the most requested and played songs across Kenyan radio. It’s also am easy to song along to song making it even more endearing and everlasting. The music video too,is among the few Kenyan videos to cross the 1 Million mark on YouTube. Brilliant.

 

3. Album of the Year – Sauti Sol’s Live and Die In Afrika.

The Sol Philosophers are a band that has been around for almost a decade. And that has been ruling the airwaves and driving girls crazy for like half a decade now. Their music is electric. With the most superior production,perfect arrangement,brilliant songwriting,flawless production,topnotch mastering,glorious melodies and international-standards packaging,Live and Die in Afrika is easily the most important album of our age. The overall product looks-and sounds-like something produced by Universal Music in collaboration with Quincy Jones,Coca Cola,Jimmy Iovine,L.A Reid and Dr. Dre. Superior.

 

4. Record of the Year – Ojuelegba, Kaligraph Jones

The Record of the Year Award if different from the Song of the Year Award in that whereas the Song of the Year Award recognizes a song’s melody,tune,songwriting and arrangement the Record of the Year Award recognizes a song’s overall production; the beat,the mastering,the sound engineering,the instrumentation. Khaligraph gets to win this Award for the fact that,even though Ojuelegba is actually another artist’s song,and the beat concept his too,King Khali did mighty justice to the song’s remix,bringing his own Vibe to the song,own story and own flow. The song even became a hit in Nigeria itself where Wizkid,the song’s original creator, hails from. Deserved win.

5. Video of the Year – Just A Band, Awuor Arunga ‘Winning In Life’

The song itself,even without talking about the video,is a masterpiece. And then comes the beautiful video for the beautiful testament of Love ‘Winning in Life’. Just A Band’s own Mbithi Masya took the lead in creating the visuals for their latest banger, backed up by some great coloring and cinematography by Joan Poggio and equally awesome choreography by Kui Kariuki and Kwach Willy. Depicting a couple’s first moments after realizing they have brought a new life into this world, this music video has so many visually captivating scenes. Who would have thought a boda boda ride could look so cool?! And those attires? And cute little love scenes? Flowers and shy smiles? Sweet.

 

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6. Best Club Banger /Dance Song- Weka Weka – P Unit.

 

This group should have walked away with the Best Video gong too. That video,directed by the masterly Enos Olik was superb! The coloring was great. Shots were classic. Choreography was beautiful and overall editing awesome. But the song itself… It was something else. No song lit up the dance floors quite like Weka Weka did. They owned the floor. These ones.

 

7.Best Songwriter- Mr. Vee

For those not in the know, Mr. Vee is the gentleman who wrote the beautiful lyrics to the monster jam ‘Mwema’ and ‘Nikupendeze’ both by Mercy Masika. Mr. Vee,a retired Gospel artist,it seems,seemed to have found his truest calling in writing music. And when he picked up that pen,crafting succulent tunes and creating glorious melodies for Mercy Masika. His star was born. Songwriter extraordinaire . Our own Ed Sheeran. Or Kirk Franklin.

 

8. Best Vocal Performance – Mercy Masika – Nikupendeze

This looks like the Mercy Masika year for real. If you’ve had the chance,the blessed chance to listen to ‘Nikupendeze’ another one of Mercy’s biggest 2015 hits,you will agree with us that the vocal performance exhibited in that song is, to say the least,award-worthy. Starting off with a sweet slow humming,graduating to a soft low stanza,veering off to a powerfully sang pre-Chorus and then an almighty chorus,Nikupendeze is sang with the brilliance of a goddess. Towards the end of the song, Mercy reminds us,yet again,why she’s East Africa’s undisputed vocal Queen. Baraka.

9. Best Live Performance-Sauti Sol

If you’ve had the chance to watch Sauti Sol on stage, you’ll understand how the band ended up here. Actually, what they did at the Ngong Racecourse over the Valentine’s weekend is enough to earn them the Award. Undisputed.

 

10. Best New Comic – Jemutai

Female comedians,all around the world,are a special species. We don’t have enough of them. And the few we have either aren’t very good or sufficiently appreciated. Among the crowd of comics – most of them boring,lame dumbfucks – who make up the Churchill Show juggernaut,a few ladies stand out. Most of the time they are good. Some other time,not all that. But one lady stands out even harder -Jemutai – the unassuming,flawlessly funny Rift Valley native. Jemutai has,for the little time she’s been on air, managed to effortlessly rise to the very top,making mincemeat of most of her unfunny male colleagues and relegating her female colleagues to the cold, back bench. Jemutai is uncharacteristically funny. Doesn’t toil too hard to make you laugh,eases through her act with sheer excellence and has a signature dress code-and sound-that, by itself,evokes laugher. She’s quickly gaining legendary status. While her humorless colleagues fumble their dumb way through a routine of tired and tried regugitates for jokes. Class act.

Bonus Award

11. Asshole of the Year – Kanye West

Yes,even here,thousands of miles away from Amuuuricah, Kanye sucks. Big. Brilliant musician though. And entertainer. For sure.

Have a winning weekend.

Clear cut crisp suit check, cologne check, nails check, clean boxers check and to sum it all up, a bright smile. If my mama taught me well, then that’s how to show up on a date.

What of the girls? I don’t know much but I would think a nice cute dress, not too short, a shade of mascara and a bit of lipstick and you are good to go.

But what happens when you have never met the person you are bound to go on a date with? What if they don’t like mascara? What if the guy is not particularly enthusiastic about brushing their teeth?

And it can still get worse. What if the word manners is nowhere in their vocabulary? Or they start talking about sex on the first date? And just when you thought it couldn’t any worse, you actually find out that they are not attractive at all.

This is a situation some two people found themselves in when they were nominated to go on a blind date courtesy of Samsung Gear 2. And what do you do when a product as superior as that beckons you? You rise up to the occasion and go.

And you rock it because it serves as the best accessory to match up with your dress. As for the guys, it makes quite the statement and as the saying goes, a man is his shoe and watch game. This is the despite the fact that it keeps you updated on the time so that you don’t show up late, that’s never a good idea on the first date; it enables you to reply to your texts and also enables to play your favourite songs, you know the ones that keep at your best mood.

Actually the list is endless and you can check it all here. In the meantime, back to our date, watch how it all unfolded. Did it end up by the guy being hit by a plate on the head? Find out here:

She was insulted by his words and she couldn’t wait till she fully recuperates to fire back at her aggressor!

The Trend panelist, Njambi Koikai, was days ago rushed to Nairobi Hospital after she suffered an acute case of Pneumothorax that made her lungs collapse.

Also Read: The Trend’s Panelist Njambi Koikai Wheeled into Surgery after Her Lung Collapses

Even though she’s still at the hospital recovering, Njambi is well too informed with what’s happening round entertainment scene.

The radio personality who also doubles up as a reggae artist was irked by Cyprian Nyakundi’s article that bashed Kenyan DJs which was published on Wednesday 17^th February on his site.

“Kenya, The Land Of Bullshit Deejays, Why Only GMoney & Stylez Make The Cut.” Nyakundi titled his article.

Nyakundi ruthlessly mauled all Kenyan DJs saying GMoney and DJ Stylez were the only ones whom he recognized as dope mix masters.

Nyakundi’s opinion piece rubbed Njambi the wrong way and she decided to hit back at Twitter bigwig from her hospital bed.

Below is Njambi’s response to Nyaks:

I have just come across this. Firstly it’s REGGAE!!! Secondly pathetic writing. Thirdly you know nothing about REGGAE and deejaying or better yet lemmi school you…in REGGAE it’s selecting not deejaying. So unresearched. I’m a fighter and defender of REGGAE before you write deep crap like this, research. Atleast that’s what journalism dictates. You have no business comparing deejays. Gmoney is different and brought his own game, so was Styles. So is Adrian and Pinye. What your focal point should have been is how technology has affected or improved the art of deejaying. Jaribu kuingilia REGGAE tena even from my sick bed my friend utatii. Inform yourself and gain knowledge before shallow writing like this.

 

Controversial gospel singer, Willy Paul, was once again spotted in the wrong side of town! Despite being a gospel singer, Willy has a knack of making appearances at city nightclubs.

The scandalous singer was last night spotted at XS millionaire, a nightclub where Queen Vee hosts her gigs.

Last night, Vera Sidika was hosting a special gig dubbed Powerball Thursday. It appears Willy wanted to witness Sidika get ratchet with his own eyes.

Willy was at XS Millionaire last night and it was Vera who spotted him. The socialite was quick to sound the alarm the moment she laid her eyes on the controversial gospel wonder boy.

The bumfull socialite dashed online to shame Willy Paul:

“He was like, you can’t say hey to a man of God?” Sidika taunted Willy Paul on social media.

Well, it’s Friday party people, time to relax and unwind. Drinks perhaps with the girls later on? Or do you have plans of finally taking that hot girl out today?

Now if that’s the case fellas, then I just have the right plot for you; Pizza Hut in the CBD along University way. The world’s largest pizza brand launched today opening Kenya to world renowned pan pizza and crust innovations that have delighted millions of customers around the world for decades.

“I am delighted that the world’s largest pizza brand is launching in Kenya. Pizza Hut is a prime example of how US investment can bring international quality products, service and standards to emerging markets,” Said U.S ambassador Robert Godec during the launch.

Feast limited, the local franchisee of Pizza Hut, has invested extensively with local suppliers and global food technologists to ensure that Kenyan consumers receive the highest quality Halaal products and global customer experience standards.

And here is the fun part, to celebrate the huge achievement; Pizza Hut is offering a more than 50% discount for 300 bob which is basically a personal Pan Pizza which includes 6 personal pan pizzas and a 500 ml Coke. Furthermore, they have pizza rave from 4 PM to around 8 PM where guys can interact, eat pizza and simply have fun while listening to some dope tunes from some of the hottest DJ’s in Kenya.

And if that’s not enough, then you can always walk down to the Westgate mall tomorrow where there will be also be launching with an offer of 2 medium pizzas and a 2L Coke for only a 1000 bob.

Everyone has that one person we go all fan girl/fan boy on and Adelle Onyango is no different.

She may be in a relationship but Adelle Onyango reveals she constantly fawns over the original ‘Classic Man’ Jidenna.

During Twitter interview by #celebrityaccess Adelle revealed that she could pass out if she came across Jidenna.

 

Brenda Kanaiza posed this question “@adelleo this crush you have on Jidenna though….if you saw Jidenna today, what’s the first thing you’d do? #CelebrityAccess

To which Adele replied:

I WOULD FAAAAINT

Word on the street is that former Nantes and Auxerre striker Denis Oliech is languishing in poverty after being team less for a while now.

He may be team less but Dennis Oliech has been proving time and time again after this news broke out that he is not penniless. And this is through wild, expensive partying. From partying with Huddah to parting at XS Millionaires club, Dennis Oliech has been having a good expensive time.

But he has not stopped yet, he recently showed off his Chrysler

 

 

And in that breath, he revealed that he had flown to France. To strike another deal maybe? Who knows.

 

 

Avril’s break up with her South Africa boyfriend was started by a picture taken out of context .A picture of Dillish Mathews chilling with longtime friend Muga on Valentine’s Day while Avril performed in Kakamega.

The picture kick-started a rumor that Dillish had snatched Muga from Avril and the two were now going steady, a rumor that is now out of control as demonstrated by the hashtag#poleAvril trending on Twitter.

After being silent for a while, the two have come out to prove that they are still together .And what better way to show ‘togetherness’ like supporting your spouse.

Muga shared this image on Instagram urging his follower to vote for his future wife:

Let me vote for the 10th time. Let’s get those votes in.. assumptions are just assumptions but a lovely heart will always shine and shine..have a blessed Friday fam

To which Avril replied “Thanks babe..“

The goddess of the decks left her tools of trade to passionately grind on a lucky man on stage!

Female celebrities are now giving their fans rare treat at entertainment hotspots. Just the other day Huddah Monroe did the same for a lucky reveler.

Also Read: Huddah Monroe Treats Fan To A Sensual Dance Grinding Her Ass On Him

DJ Pierra Makena has now followed in the footsteps of the socialite to grind a dude on stage. The mix mistress rubbed her majestic butt on the man’s nether regions though the lucky dude wasn’t quick enough to grasp her waist for a real tight dance.

Watch the video below to see Pierra do her thing:

Amani first flaunted her Nigerian boyfriend Chinasa Udeala during the MCSK awards ceremony about a year ago.

Making it the first time Amani has introduced any of her boyfriends to the public. Chinasa is said to be a techpreneur and has founded the wildly popular Audio.Chat , an app where people in sub-Saharan Africa can effortlessly share images and sounds using less data and is also the brains behind popular gossip website omg.co.ke.

The duo opted for a double date with Shamillah Kiptoo, the wife to MCSK C.E.O and the couple looked so in love. Check them out below:

 

Kenya Wildlife Service (KWS) is in search of 6 lions that escaped from Nairobi National Park and reportedly sneaked to Langata Estate.

KWS has put up toll-free numbers: 0800 597 000 and 0800 221 5566 asking the public help them trace 6 lions that are on the loose.

Langata residents today woke up to the sounds of Landcruisers and KWS officers who had put up a search for the big cats.

Photos: Courtesy

 

A man in Eastleigh Kenya just did the unimaginable…stealing from the police.

More shockingly, is what he stole keeping in mind how police treat even a simple retaliatory remark. The man clearly on a high adrenaline rush from a supply of the best weed Eastleigh has to offer made off with a police motor bike, their most treasured asset given its ability.

Why he decided to do that is still unknown given that by the time the photo was being taken he was way out of the cop’s radar. This is truly a guy with guts and elephantine balls. Here is the hilarious picture of the incident which happened at Mlango Kubwa today.

 

 

 

Unlike most celebrities who like to keep their love life under wraps, Prezzo’s love life has been well documented.

And in between dating Goldie and Chagga Barbie, Prezzo is believed to have dated Diva Loveness, a popular radio host on Clouds F.M. So good was Prezzo’s loving, that Diva dumped her old guy for Prezzo.

 

Unfortunately the relationship was filled with cat fights with Huddah and a lot of drama before they broke it off. 3 years on, Diva seems to have moved on to a new man, a man who looks like a looker, judging from this bodyshot taken on Valentine’s Day.

 

Diva shared a photo in bed with her new love and she captioned the photo “Love is…when the happiness of another person is essential to your own! #WhatIsLove #HappyValentinesDay”

What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you as a man? Like have you ever tried hollaing at some chick on instagram and she in turn shares the screenshots on her timeline? Where you are obviously gloating to be the true akuku danger with a transformer behemoth than the true Mandingo himself?

Or better still, have you ever chased a girl for over a year, a girl out of your league obviously and finally when you land yourself a date you run out of money? That happened to me last week when I took this girl to a seafood restaurant somewhere in Westlands. I swear I had skimmed through the menu online so I had a rough idea of how much we would spend.

My date for the night was Triza…now Triza is no ordinary girl. She’s an investment banker, whose idea of fun is driving out of town, stopping in the middle of nowhere and staring at the sky. She also thinks instagram and watching TV is for bimbos and spends most of her time engrossed in books. And that’s not all; she is also hot as hell; 5’5 with scarlet hips and some really pouty lips. She immediately attracts the attention of every man when she steps into a room so you can only imagine what this particular date meant for me.

So there we are on a Saturday night, having the time of our lives and sipping some Casillero del Diablo from Chile while laughing hysterically about the nonsense being propagated by the republicans vying for presidency in the States; told you she was smart and the waiter brings the bill. We have having such a great time I had failed to notice two hours had gone with the wind.

I give it a glance and I can’t believe what I’m seeing. It says 8500 bob and I only had 5G’s. Mind you I didn’t have any money on my Airtel Money account and I had left my wallet at home and with it my debit card. Suddenly all the excitement washes out my face and a panic mode takes centre stage. Triza is so mesmerized with my wit so she fails to notice the sudden change of mood.

At this particular point in time, a thousand thoughts are going through my mind as I try to comprehend what to do. Checking my phone I don’t even have credit godamnit! The devil had definitely played a good one on me this time!

It’s too much for me at that particular point in time so I decide to excuse myself to go to the washroom first. I needed to think and Triza’s beautiful face was not helping the situation. I couldn’t believe this perfect night was going to be ruined just like that.  “Or should I be open with her, you know be honest?” I asked myself. Definitely not, I would surely be the laughing stock of all her friends. “What if I left my phone with management?” I again thought. Surely not; what would be my excuse for leaving my phone?

Right there and then, the janitor walks in…smiles at me and continues to do their business. That’s when an idea strikes me. “How about asking him for help?” …. I explain my situation and fortunately he hears me out sending me a 20 bob on my Airtel line.

Excitedly I subscribe to Unliminet and call Danny my boy; I explain my desperate situation. He chuckles and offers to send me some 3500 bob which he had. Again I start to panic because of pesa ya kutoa but only for a second since that’s not the case with Airtel money…they don’t charge you for transactions; Pheeew!

So without triza noticing, I sneak out and head to the nearest Aitel money outlet where I withdraw the guap, head back to the restaurant and slide back into my seat as if nothing had happened. Of course she beckons why I had taken so long but I’m a smart fella so I easily cruise around it.

And guess what, since I have some bundles, I call an Uber on the company’s account though (I hope my boss doesn’t read this) and I drop her off to her place.

And because I was being such a gentleman, she plants a kiss on my lips and asks when she will be seeing me again. Well now because I’m a G, I told her I would keep it as a surprise.

20 bob saved my life and I bet it can do to. I mean 20MB data, 8 minutes talk time to any network and 20 SMSs to any network. Can it get better than that? Dial *544# and subscribe now. 

Is Former Big Brother Africa Hotshots winner Idris Sultan cheating on his girlfriend Wema Sepetu? Has he found solace in another lady’s arms after learning of the deaths of his unborn twins?

Apparently Idris was raving at Sky-Night Life in Dar es Salaam on the night of Valentine’s Day with sizzling hot Bongo actresses, Elizabeth Michael ‘Lulu’ and Rose Peter ‘Muna’, when he received bad news about the loss of his unborn babies.

Bongo Movies, a site about Tanzanian thespians, says Idris cried like a baby when he heard Wema Sepetu had a miscarriage.

The former BBA winner found solace in Muna’s arms and stopped crying a few minutes later. Idris’ grief evaporated the moment he landed in Muna’s arms as Bongo Movies says Wema Sepetu’s boyfriend was full of joy when he was chatting with Muna and Lulu while seating close to each other.

“Akiwa ameketi ‘veri klozi’ na Lulu, Idris alionekana kuwa mwenye tabasamu ‘baab’kubwa’ ambapo wakati wote vilisikika vicheko, ikiwemo kunong’onezana mara kadhaa, jambo lililosababisha baadhi ya wadau kuhojiana kama Idris amehamishia majeshi kwa Lulu au la.” (As he was seated with Lulu, Idris was full of joy bursting into loud laughter throughout making other revelers wonder whether he had transferred his grief to Lulu.)” Bongo Movies reported.

Bongo Movies says Idris got out of the arena alone only to be followed by Lulu and Muna shortly and then they disappeared from Sky-Night.

Idris With Lulu and Muna at Sky-Night

Credit: Bongo Movies

 

When unveiling luxurious sports cars one after the other, South Sudanese rapper based in Kenya Babyone can pass off as a narcissist  bloke.

That however, does not mean he is actually one. In the first week of this month, the rapper lost his father, Lt. Gen Lual Diing, a South Sudan hero, who by the time of his death was the presidential advisor on political affairs. In mourning his father the singer cut off his trademark locks which have been one of his defining aspects throughout his musical career.

His clean shaven look does give him that elderly settled mature look and maybe it is in line with his new responsibility as head of the family. Whether he lets them grow back only time will tell. All in all we pass our dear condolences to the family. Here is the rapper with his new look.

Kenyans are wondering whether incoming Ghanaian High Commissioner was clothed with State House curtains. Sema culture shock!!

H.E. Kwame Asamoah Tenkorang stunned Kenyans after he visited State House to present his credentials to Uhuru Kenyatta rocking traditional Ghanaian attire.

Contrary to popular belief that suit is the ideal wear for formal meetings, the Ghanaian was comfortable in his ‘bed sheet’ and this totally baffled Kenyans.

See the reactions from Kenyans below:

Humble Kinya: Kwanini amevalishwa curtains za Statehouse?

Edward Abongo: Amedress kama maasai rais .

Kuria Symon: Amevaa blanketi na iyo solar aki

Boniface Mungai: He’s wearing like a true African apround African

Gitobu Guantai Imanene: Is that guy Wearing a Curtain???????

Gathiaka Peter: The heck he’s wearing?

Danëll Mùcheru: Moving around draped in bed sheets lord!

Fred Puskas: Jamaa amevaa bedsheets. Kwani nguo imeenda wapi?

Edward Madoya: When you meet Africa leaders, somebody tell President Uhuru and Dp Ruto they should dress in Kikuyu, Kalenjin Ligalia, Ndio tuamini waliachana na mambo ya Mzungu.

Dennis Obura: I don’t know much about fashion but this Ghanaian one is their father “baba yao” Welcome Sir to Kenya, the jewel of Africa.

Njoroge Thuku: he looks cool in his native dress while my president looks funny in a mzungu dress. dont u worry Mr. president i too dress like u. the British did a very good job on us…

Samwel Njoroge Vitamax: What’s wrong with west african men, dressing like a fool, the world is changed, that guy looks like crazy human

Shotta Isaac: I wish Kenya had its own national dress…. This is something!

Njeri Yvonne: Culture speaks. The attire is out of this world…. Welcome to Kenya

Pitah Gashuhy: Thats fine my president and also you should put on kenya’s cultural attire.

Atsu Anani Kossi Gafo: I love his african traditionnal dressing

Bobie Enze Kwame: doesn’t have a suit?…straight from the dark jungle…dress up for the occasion, some africans act backward, they’ll always remain there…this ain’t cultural day dresssing like a woman

Greg Musyoka: Is he wearing a dress?

After we reported about his presence in Kenya;s first pro gay music video, Kiharu MP Irungu Kangata has now given his views on the whole matter.

The MP who is captured in the video leading opposition towards gay rights actually has no issue with his presence in the video. Speaking to Kenyans.co.ke, Mr. Irungu says given that he is portrayed in the ‘right manner’ that is as one of the vocal opponents of homosexuality in Kenya. 

“I think they want to show I am among those opposed to gay issues. If you watch the video well, I am placed amongst those that fight against them which is true,” said the MP.

However, this does not mean the MP supports the song. He is against the whole concept and blames the people who came up with it saying they promoted immorality. Mr Kang’ata said he will be following up the matter to see that the song is banned for its ‘immoral’ content.

Fire engine sprang into action to put off a blazing inferno that was torching a car just outside State House Nairobi.

No call for alarm! It wasn’t an incident of ‘White House Down’ or ‘Olympus Has Fall’, just a normal accident!

Security officers manning State House perimeter fence must have been tensed seeing a car bursting into flames.

Such kind of incidents are popular in Somalia where suicide bombers try accessing presidential palace by forcing themselves with cars filled with explosives.

But that wasn’t the case in Kenya, it was just a ‘normal’ accident. The rare incident happened at night just outside the main gate of the house on the hills.

Watch the video below:

Credit: Dennis Itumbi