Month: January 2015

Burial arrangement for the late Fidel Odinga have been revealed. The departed will be laid to rest this coming weekend.

The funeral committee organizing the burial program for Fidel Odinga has release details of the arrangement. Fidel will be laid to rest on 10^th Saturday January 2015.

A requiem mass for Fidel shall be held at Coptic Church on Thursday. On Friday, Fidel’s body will be flown to Kisumu and subsequently to Bondo.

The final resting place for Fidel will be at his parent’s rural home in Opoda farm. It is there that the last mass shall be held before family, friends and relatives bid the final good bye to Fidel.

Kalekye Mumo is part of the cast of a new steamy video featuring renowned Kenyan actors and actresses.

Kiss FM’s radio presenter, Kalekye Mumo, joined her colleagues (actors and actresses) of the much awaited movie, Fundi-mentals, to drop a steamy video to the title track of their latest comedy movie.

The video features Fundi-mentals crew showing their sexy side as they sing along to the lyrics. The video is not only eye catchy, it is very humorous as well.

Check it out here:

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Meanwhile, Fundi-Mentals the movie will premiere on the 12th of February, 2015 at IMAX, on the 13th of February at Prestige Plaza Cinemas and on the 14th of February on “Two Hours of Sunset” event in Ngong Road Racecourse.

The Good book thus records  on 1st Timothy 6:10 “For money is the root of all evil..”  But we cannot deny the fact that the statement is  in itself a double-standard, It is etched on duality, Money is evil, but It can do a great deal of good as well. Yes?

But I digress. 
The following are photos of Churchill show’s comedians before all the money and the fame- you can call them throw backs though it is not yet Thursday. 

News that is still lingering amidst us is the sudden demise of Raila Odinga’s eldest son Fidel Castro Odinga which occurred yesterday morning after a night out with friends.

As many are mourning and saddened by the untimely demise of the eldest son of the former premier, one Mugo Wa Wairimu has consistently made reckless postings on his social media accounts, not considering the pain the Odinga family is going through at this moment.

This is why Dennis Itumbi has joined many other Kenyans to warn Mugo over what he speaks about the dead.

Itumbi posted a comprehensive piece urging Mugo to refrain from such reckless postings. This is what he told him:

To Mugo Wa Wairimu – Our worst enemies are those who keep quiet when they should have told you the truth.

I have no problem with mourning someone as sincerely as you find it within your heart and mind.

But Daktari … it befits a people to let their neighbours mourn their son in the best way and in complete comfort even as we Pray for God to provide them the special peace that surpasses all understanding.

In less than a month, two buildings have collapsed in Nairobi, killing scores and injuring many others.

It started off in Majengo in Eastlands when a building collapsed and killed its occupants and injured many more. As if that was not enough, another building collapsed last evening, trapping many residents in the rubble, leaving many injuries to the victims.

This has prompted Citizen TV’s Julie Gichuru to call upon the government to carry a comprehensive inspection of all buildings in Nairobi to ensure safety for the occupants.

Julie particularly wondered how one could pay rent to be trapped in collapsing walls.

It also seems that inspectors and engineers who give go-aheads for the structures to be put up are doing shoddy jobs, therefore risking lives of Nairobi residents.

This is what Julie posted:

“Tragic! People paid rent only for the walls to crush in on them #HurumaBuildingCollapse Thorough inspections must be undertaken across NBI.”

Barely 48 hours after the death of Fidel Odinga,Raila Odinga’s eldest son,yet another famous family has been hit by a death. This time,a famous son has lost a Father.

Former Interior Cabinet Minister in the Jubilee Government,Joseph Ole Lenku has lost his father. Mzee Lenku Ole Mpaa died this morning and the news was broken largely by the President of the Republic of Kenya,Uhuru Kenyatta.

Mzee Lenku was Joseph Ole Lenku’s father and while its still not yet clear why he has passed away,chances are that he may have passed away due to old age…Or natural circumstances as it is popularly said.

Breaking the news and condoling with the family,Uhuru Kenyatta posted a heartfelt message on Facebook calling Mzee Mpaa an “illustrious servant of the people whose determination saw him rise through the ranks in Administration to reach the position of Senior Chief.“

Below is the rest of the President’s message.

My condolences to the family of Mzee Lenku Ole Mpaa, father to former Interior Cabinet Secretary Joseph Ole Lenku, who died this morning. Mzee Ole Mpaa was an illustrious servant of the people whose determination saw him rise through the ranks in Administration to reach the position of Senior Chief. He was a distinguished Maasai leader who contributed immensely to his community’s development. He had the virtue of being a good organizer with excellent administrative skills and was also a man of enormous influence and outstanding ability among his peers. His exemplary virtues of hardwork and dedication to duty were an inspiration to many of those who had the privilege to work with him. His death is not only a big loss to his family but also to the nation, which he served with commitment and dedication. I pray that God grants his family the strength to bear the loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this time of sorrow.

Ghafla sends our heartfelt condolences to the families of both Ole Lenku and Raila Odinga at this very trying times.

Ever met a family where everyone is just ridiculously gorgeous?

Well, that is Yvonne Maingey’s family as revealed in a photo she shared of her sister Fiona. Yvonne and her sister are among the selected few who have hit the gene pool jackpot.

They look so good that one cannot help but think that the Maingey parents must be packing some incredibly serious genetic firepower. After all it’s not every day you see parents manage to pull off this good-looking pair. Meet Fiona Maingey:

You know Yvonne as the comely lass who has had men thirsting over her during prime time news

After Raila Odinga’s son passed away under unclear circumstances, news reaching us is that James Orengo’s son Bob James Orengo has been admitted to Agha Khan Hospital.

Robert Ali alleges that the senator’s son was rushed to hospital in a critical condition after a night out with friends.

While athletes such as Rudisha and Mercy Cherono are enjoying a great career and the good life thanks to their wins, other athletes like Conjestina and Maurice Odumbe are living a life of squalor.

Maurice Odumbe who was one of the best cricket players this side of the Sahara is now a shadow of his former self. He is eking out a living as Robert Burale of Citizen Tv Fashion Watch claims.He shared this post on Facebook :

Sad afternoon. ..I bumped into my old friend Maurice odumbe…. once the best cricketer in this side of the world..he put Kenya in the map..every newspaper was ODUMBE THE BEST. …ODUMBE THE MAN. .but now he is left to wallow in desperation and living like a beggar (his own words)…and he tells me that IBRAHIM BILALI the former boxer is even worse..DO WE FORGET OUR HEROES,??? SAAAAAAD. (I put up this post in Maurice’s presence) LETS HELP HIM

Socialite Vera Sidika made headlines in 2014 when she went overboard to be the first Kenyan to alter her complexion and enlarge her body parts, thanks to her engagements in the socialite world.

She was rumoured to date a wealthy Nigerian oligarch who furnished her living standards, effectively plunging her into the international fame.

Even though Vera does not look as real as Ugandan socialite Zari, she has received much backing from a number of celeberities.

While other Kenyans bashed her for her exploits, Caroline Mutoko thinks she is the figure that made 2014 an interesting year and that is likely to make 2015 even more interesting.

Mutoko remembers the day she hosted Vera in her Kiss 100 show and this made her change her mind about the socialite.

Other celebrities and people making Mutoko’s list include Larry Madowo of the Trend. Madowo has been a phenomenal figure on our screens, rising from level to level to become one of the most adored TV personalities in Kenya.

There is also Njoki Chege of the Daily Nation. Who does not know Njoki Chege? This is the woman who has zero chills and has consistently made men, especially those with Blue Subarus have sleepless nights and feel so belittled. She, consequently, entertains Caroline Mutoko a lot.

Here is what Mutoko said about them and the other two individuals who according to her underlined 2014 and are expected to make 2015 even bolder.

People say that socialites do not have to work hard, but being a socialite in Kenya is hard work. You are better off lifting stones at a mjengo because maintaining your Instagram-worthy lifestyle as a socialite is not easy. E No Easy…ooh.

You have to have high-end phones no mulika-mwizi’s for you, lustrous hair from foreign countries and state of the art cars to get the recognition you deserve. But what happens when one cannot keep up with the likes of Vera?

What happens when you can only afford to rummage through mtush and Gikosh? What happens when the only bottle of Chateau Margaux you could ever afford is one brewed at a questionable distillery by Nairobi River?

You find dodgy means to remain relevant such a stealing, drinking and dashing and for some shopping and dashing.
Vanessa got herself into a pickle after allegedly shopping then refusing to pay up. The result was her being hang to dry on Buyers Beware.

Sorry people for the suspense, was trying reach the “shoshoret” on phone.

Well everything went on well, but as soon as I said why I was calling her, she kept saying ” I can’t hear you” can’t hear you ” Ari” ?

So, told her she has been exposed as the shoshorate who hangs about on borrowed clothes and we are going to put her pics on FB to warn people.

She goes like, well my pictures are all over FB aaaannd, hangs up.

She said, ” stop bothering me for cheap small money” and the line was dead.

So, y’all sellers out there, be aware. Never know you might be next. It might only be 1500kshs she is owing but deni hata ” fiu” ni mbeca.

5:14pm
Joan Joanna

Hello Atty,
I want to shame one Vanessa Chettle, shes a ‘socialite’ whom i got to sell dresses for her events but she doesn’t pay. She owes me sh 1500. Might be little money but i can do something all the same.
I sold her 3 dresses in different times. She had a mzungu husband in which she made me chase around to get the cash instead of telling him herself.

For the 3rd dress, she said she’ll pay herself in which it has been a cat and mouse game. Stood me up in town one time.everytime i call her she promises to send immediately but that never happens. I would appreciate if you helped me get the cash.

Attempts to reach Vanessa for her comment on this matter proved futile as our calls went unanswered.

There are a million places Caroline Mutoko could have spent her birthday at but she opted to go to Korogosho slum. There is a good reason behind her action though.

Caroline started the year with making a difference, she wanted to impact positively on the lives of the less fortunate in society.

She went on a charity mission during her birthday (last week); Caroline visited the informal settlement of Korogosho alongside a team from the Safaricom Foundation and took part in raising cash towards refurbishment of a school.

Caroline revealed it was her first time to use her birthday to make a difference. Down is what she posted and some pictures of her during her charity mission?

Today is my birthday

For the first time in forever, I’ve to use this year and my birthday to make a difference.

So last week, I visited Korogosho with an amazing team from The Safaricom Foundation and saw something I would like to be a part of.

I’d like to help the school in these pictures.

Please help me raise Kshs. 400,000/= towards the cement costs for re-building this school, by sending whatever you can to

Mpesa Paybill Number 843 843

account number: Birthday Gift.

This year, no messages or gifts for me -what I’d really love is you to help me support this school.

Ommy Dimpoz has those super cute Davido dimples that have made him a hit with the ladies, but what has actually gained him respect is the slew of hit songs he has managed to unleash.

And Ommy is looking to expand his fan base in Kenya as he will be collaborating with Avril for a new song that is expected to rock our airwaves. And it’s about time! God knows we have been waiting for the Avril-Ommy collabo for the longest time.

Avril posted this indicating that we should expect something hot from her end at the beginning of this year.

Thank you Enashipai, Kaka Empire, Ommy Dimpoz, ManWater, OgopaDjs, Steve and the entire amazinggg Team Sync….this here project has taken me 3 years to do. I can only but thank God for this new year’s gift. #TearsInMyEyesWhileIPostThis #God’sTimeIsTheBestTime.

We can only hope that this song will be great, because after the bland ‘Nikimuona’ , Avril needs redemption .*crossing my fingers*

Over the weekend I received some very disturbing news. Daily nation columnist Njoki Chege had attacked Blue Subarus again. Blue is my favorite color and the Subaru is one of my favorite vehicles. Perhaps that’s the reason why I have emerged from my cave all daggers drawn. To pour more water on a sinking boat, she unleashed her fury on men who have Instagram accounts too.

Normally, I’m not the kind of guy to react after getting hit by blunt projectiles but when someone belittles the things you adore, you have every right to pull a verbal Mayweather on them . I had vowed not to comment on anything Chege-ish but whenever I logged into Twitter I got bombarded with global outpourings of Chegemania. I believe this is what is called Chege-sim-by-proxy. ‘That’s the ish I don like.’

I understand that Njoki Chege is not everyone’s cup of tea. She can be abrasive, arrogant and intolerant to mediocrity. I respect her bold attitude but I have to straighten the bent lines before every young Kenyan girl out there is made to believe that Subarus are vehicles for losers. And that Instagram, the smartest invention since Facebook, is an application for basic brothers. I will play Olivia Pope (damage controller) for all the affected ninjas.. Like one Twitter user said, Subaru Kenya need a sit down with Njoki Chege before she ruins their brand completely.

If you are serious about cars, then you understand that Subarus are among the most highly recommended vehicles in the world. Even Top Gear, the worlds’ number one Car Review Show has had all models of Subarus certified excellent.

I have a conspiracy theory slash assumption on the origins of Njoki Chege’s beef with Subaru loving men. I just have this feeling that Njoki Chege was ‘chips funguad’ by a guy with dreadlocks from Kayole. The most likely scenario is that she met this guy at some event , let’s say at Masaku Sevens last year and the guy had a cool Subaru Imprezza. The probability stakes here are that he might have lied to her he lived in Karen then whisked her to his uncle’s mansion in the leafy suburbs. Then he smashed her like a Zinjanthropus that was mating and never called her again. Yani shuma ililala ndani ya (S)hege. All she now sees is the guy posing on Instagram with other clueless women

But that’s not the point really. Let’s get to the Subaru once again. There’s something solid in that car that other car manufacturers try to emulate, but just can’t seem to master. And that’s it’s never ending elegance. A Sub might not be as luxurious or as high-class as a BMW or Range Rover, but it gets the job done and gets it done well — and that’s what all-wheel drive performance is all about. So what if it costs 600k. How many young people can afford that? If you can successfully buy one without a loan, it means you are on your pathway to success and I don’t see any justifiable reason to rubbish that sort of achievement.

It’s the perfect Bachelor’s car. It’s the car for the man with potential. The man who will buy a Mercedes in future. When you’re ripping through muddy trails of Kenya’s bad roads at unruly speeds, heel-toeing and hand-braking and generally having a good time, a Subaru is the machine to have. Loaded with an upped 265-horsepower 2.5-liter turbo engine instead of the standard 224 one is just blown away when driving a Sub.

Apparently the Njoki Chege type just likes ready-made men. They don’t care to know how the man was baked. They don’t like making a man. Most of those ready-made men that have planes and twenty million shilling cars now all started with a Toyota, Subaru or Nissan salon car. And those men are married now. They have families. So excuse me, but what I’ve witnessed oozing from that Nation writer so far is just side chick mentality.

What about Instagram? There’s no crime for a man to be on Instagram. This wonderful application makes you measure your appeal. It actually makes you know how likeable you are so that you improve or keep it that way. In today’s world, being cool and classy is essential. Only ugly women hate Instagram because they have nothing to show off. And i have a problem with ugly women who have unrealistic standards. If Njoki Chege was to bend, she would look like a geometrical set compass at 90 degrees.

Hot girls on Instagram love guys on Instagram because guys on Instagram are the ones who give the likes. Maybe Miss Chege once made an attempt on posting a photo there but only got five likes. Then she went on a fuming spree and declared herself ‘hot and in demand’ in her recent article. She feels hot? Okay that’s understandable. Maybe it’s because of the hot Nairobi sun, because I feel hot too. It’s hot. Let me take off my jacket.

Listen here lady, we are not going to quit Instagram just because you said so. I know it’s easy to dismiss the photo application as the playground of voyeurs and those afflicted by FOMO (“fear of missing out”) but it has helped make the careers of paint artists, photographers and fashionistas .

The only problem with Instagram is the food-porn maniacs. The people who post pictures of chicken and beef steak and praise the meals so much you would think it’s Beyonce lying on a bed in purple Gucci lingerie. Otherwise the app is just fine. If you don’t have time for it, that’s your problem. If you lack enough data bundles that’s your problem. Holla at your Nanyuki bound man to find time between kissing his clande in order to sambza you data bundles. Don’t go digging out none-facts that’ll help you demonize a rather perfect app. So what if I filter my photo and end up looking like a black Bradley Cooper? If it’ll make Njeri want to devour me, then it’s a go. People use dirty tricks to achieve end goals all the time. Let Subarus be. Na sio tafadhali

Go lick ice on the alps you ^$#%$&^$$&$ (*&(&(

Uhuru Kenyatta and Raila Odinga are known as political nemesis, the ying to each other’s yang. But the two have put aside their differences following the unexpected and tragic death of Fidel Odinga, Raila’s most well-known son.

Young Raila’s lifeless body was found yesterday in the wee hours of the morning by his young wife after a night of merry-making. A postmortem examination was performed on the body to determine the cause of this tragic incident  but the results are yet to be released.His body is currently at the Lee Funeral home.

Following this incidence, Uhuru took to Twitter to express his grief over the untimely demise of Fidel, posting this

We may not have performed as badly in the Press Freedom Index as Turkmenistan, DRC and Eritrea , but don’t bring out the champagne and caviar yet. Kenya’s press freedom has greatly declined.

In fact last year saw us drop from position 71 in 2013 to position 90 in the press freedom index. The report claims that the decline can be attributed to draconian legislation and what they say is the government’s  dictatorial response to the media’s coverage of the Westgate Mall attacks.

Here is a screenshot from the report:

Increase in violent threats against journalists as witnessed in recent times might have also caused this decline

Boniface Mwangi a photo journalist recently came out fearing for his life and now Daily Nation reports that Mohammed Ali of the Jicho Pevu fame had gone into hiding.

It is said that Mr. Ali retreated to a safe house recently something which his colleague John Allan Namu confirmed.
“I am aware my colleague was in hiding but he has now taken leave. I think what he is going through because of his work is deplorable. Investigative journalism is important in a democracy and should not be seen as a crime,” concluded Allan Namu.